I am often asked how I read so many books. My pat answer is something like this: “The more you read, the easier it gets. When you’ve read 8 books on marriage, the 9th goes really quickly.” The point is that there is a kind of sameness to Christian publishing where books tend to focus on the same themes, exposit the same passages, quote the same authors, and in the end say roughly the same things. It’s awfully refreshing, then, when you encounter a book that is different and distinct. And that’s exactly the case with Chad and Emily Van Dixhoorn’s Gospel-Shaped Marriage: Grace for Sinners to Love Like Saints.

“This is a book for couples, but not just couples,” they say. “The institution of marriage is an integral part of the life of the Christian church. Time spent thinking about marriage will help some of us be more thoughtful about married life and all of us be more prayerful. For that reason, we appeal directly to married people throughout, but we also have in mind those who are only thinking about marriage or who want to support married people. There are no R-rated scenes. There are only helps for the married, prompts for those who want to pray, and encouragements for those who wish to defend and promote the institution of marriage, this gift from God that every church member ought to treasure, whether married or not.”
There are a few features of the book that the authors point out as distinguishing it from many others: its brevity (it’s just 160 pages), its focus on Christian spouses as being both sinners and saints (and therefore capable of great sin but also true holiness), and the way that, instead of drawing from contemporary books on marriage, it looks instead to the distant past (and especially to William Gouge’s classic Domestical Duties).
Gospel-Shaped Marriage begins with a brief explanation of what the Bible says about marriage—the basics that we can no longer take for granted in this age of confusion and deliberate deconstruction. They then set marriage in its redemptive-historical context, using Augustine of Hippo’s framework to show how marriage is different in its garden variety, in its fallen state, in its redeemed state, and in its future state. “The marriage of eternity is better than the marriage of time. In heaven, the all-fulfilling relationship will not be between man and woman, but between God in Christ and the church as his bride. It was not good for Adam to be without Eve in the garden, but it will be fine for him to be without her in the new heavens and the new earth. Marriage is eternal in its significance, not because it lasts for eternity, but because it can be used to equip us for eternity.”
The third chapter is an important one as it deals with grace in marriage and the tricky matter of mutual submission. They draw some fascinating insights from Gouge that “Ephesians 5 is not an improvement guide for spouses … On the contrary, we are told one another’s duties for the purpose of making their work a joy to them—just as Scripture puts it, in another context, for ministers and church members (Heb. 13:17).” There are very practical consequences to this: “Are husbands to love their wives (to pick one example of a duty)? Then wives are to make themselves as lovable as possible, for this is the principal way of helping a husband with his own duty to love her. Is a wife supposed to respect her husband? Then he needs to do his best to be worthy of respect in order to help her respect him.”
The subsequent chapters turn to the particular place of women in marriage, then to the particular place of men, focusing still on the New Testament’s key verses on marriage from Ephesians 5. A chapter titled “Winning in Marriage” looks at troubled marriages, “Family and Marriage” discusses leaving parents and adding children, while “Bedtime in Marriage” turns to intimacy and sexuality—topics that are covered with appropriate levels of detail and discretion. It wraps up with “Growing in Marriage,” which is about mutually growing in grace.
Gospel-Shaped Marriage is as good a book on marriage as any I’ve read and one I plan to recommend often and read alongside others. Though it could be a good option for pre-marriage reading, it would definitely be a perfect option for a mid-marriage refresher. If I was asked to offer an improvement, I might suggest that, while the word should is used frequently, it is not always clear how that word of moral obligation is linked to biblical commands. Yes, we can have confidence that “the first thing we should look for in a marriage is someone of the opposite sex,” but I’d say it is more difficult to demand that “Christian couples should ask how they can pray for each other in the morning.” While one of these is a biblical mandate, the other is merely a wise suggestion, and I always consider it helpful to distinguish between the two.
Over the past few years we have seen a sudden outburst of gospel-driven, gospel-focused, gospel-shaped, and other gospel-hyphenated books. Gospel-Shaped Marriage is among the best of them and, I suspect, among the few that will have some longevity—and that’s because marriage truly is shaped by the gospel since it exists to display the gospel. It combines sound biblical teaching with helpful real-life application and does so in a way that can help change, improve, and perhaps even transform any marriage.

Buy from Amazon

My thanks goes to Christian Focus for sponsoring the blog this week with news of an excellent new biography on John Ross.

There are a few new Kindle deals today.
Westminster Books continues their deals today with discounts on children’s books.
(Yesterday on the blog: Black Friday 2022 Deals for Christians)
David French and the Future of Orthodox Protestantism
This is an important one from Carl Trueman. “It is now clear that orthodox Protestants, specifically evangelicals, do not own the country. Whether they ever did is a matter for debate; that they thought they did is indisputable.”
Is Islam Really the Fastest Growing Religion in the World?
You have probably heard that Islam is the fastest-growing religion in the world. But is it really?
The search for authenticity
“Churches in hard places may seem full of people being authentic, but people often recoil from the authenticity on display because it is, well, too authentic. The sins on display, that with the church’s help may be repented of, are too much for some to wear. How can professing believers do that?”
A Workaday Faith
“We all want to do great things for Jesus. That’s normal and healthy. But we’re not all going to get to.” Indeed. But this isn’t a bad thing!
The Embattled Pastor
“Disagreement, misunderstandings, frustration, and disunity can tear at the seams of Christ’s church. Conflict leads to hurt feelings, judged motives, and flared tempers. Church members might take sides. Gossip and whispers spread like wildfire, and soon the forest is raging. If criticism is like a sprained ankle, conflict is the fracture.”
When Your Spouse Suffers from Chronic Pain or Illness
Those who are accompanying their spouse through a time of chronic pain or illness may benefit from this two-part article at Biblical Counseling Coalition.
Flashback: How I Review a Book
This is a loose format I follow in many of my reviews and I have found it quite effective in reaching a general audience with an interest in popular-level books. I hope you find it helpful!

The most rebellious thing we can do in a world that prioritizes nonconformity above all is to stand out from the crowd by deliberately conforming our soul, mind, and body to a truth bigger than ourselves and our desires. —Trevin Wax

Every month I put together a roundup of new and notable books for grownup readers. But I also receive a lot of books for kids and like to put together the occasional roundup of these books as well. So today I bring you a whole big batch of new books for kids of all ages (up to and including teens).
Board Books

What Are Eyes For? and What Are Ears For? by Abbey Wedgeworth. These are entries in the growing “Training Young Hearts” series and are for the youngest of children. The series “addresses the attitudes of the heart that underpin behavior and explains how the gospel of grace enables us to change. Parents, teachers, and other loved ones can refer back to these resources when specific behaviors need both to be corrected and to be connected to forgiveness, grace and growth.” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

God Cares for Me (For the Bible Tells Me So) by Kristen Wetherell. “Everyone’s a theologian—even your little one. Each board book in the For the Bible Tells Me So series offers kids ages 0-4 an introduction to key facets of the gospel and a glimpse at the joy found when children embrace Christ as their Lord and Savior. In God Cares for Me, author Kristen Wetherell explores God’s creation and providence, revealing his abundant care for the things he has made—including his children!” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)
Books for Little Children

Coop Messes Up by Sarah Reju. “Coop Wheelie is the youngest in his family, and like many little ones, he has a problem obeying the rules–and there are a lot of them! When Coop runs out of gas, his sister, Lucy, tries to help him learn to follow the rules, but finds herself right in the middle of the trouble too. Through Coop’s story, kids will discover that making mistakes can be an important way to learn about forgiveness and the gospel. The first in The Wheelies series, written by Sarah Reju and illustrated by Tania Rex, Coop Messes Up will teach children ages 3-8 about God’s unconditional love for us.” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

David: Finding Jesus in the Story of David by Alison Mitchell. “Moments in David’s story when David is a little bit like Jesus are signposted with symbols that children need to spot, helping them to understand the relationship between the Old and New Testaments. This fun, interactive resource will give children skills to read the Bible as they connect the stories and learn that the whole Bible is about Jesus. Great for parents or grandparents to give children aged 4-7. Can also be used as a homeschool resource or for children’s ministry in church.” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

Lucy and the Saturday Surprise by Melissa Kruger and Charlie and the Preschool Prodigal by Ginger Blomberg. This is a pair of new entries in the growing TGC Kids series for children 4-7. The first “the dangers of envy and the joy of contentment” while the second introduces children to the dangers of self-righteousness. (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

My First ABC Book of Bible Verses by Jonathan Gibson. “Jonathan Gibson helps toddlers and preschoolers learn key Bible verses along with their ABCs. Each letter of the alphabet has a bright, captivatingly illustrated page with a short, foundational Bible verse to be memorized and a simple sentence that helps explain the verse.” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

The Story Of God Our Savior by Kenneth Padgett & Shay Gregorie. “The Story of God Our Savior worshipfully surveys God’s loving acts of deliverance across the vista of the biblical story–with the Cross of Christ lifted up on the highest peak. Take your family on this journey. Ponder together the exodus, remember God’s exile-ending kindness, and meditate on Jesus’ triumph over sin and death! By the end of this story your family will know this about God: He’s abounding in love, a Savior who mends. Always and forever, world without end.” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

How Do I Get to Heaven?: Questions and Answers about Life and Death by Nancy Gorrell. “In simple terms, this attractive, full–colour illustrated hardback paints a beautiful picture of heaven and explains what heaven will be like. It also explains that the only way to heaven is by trusting in the death and resurrection of Jesus. Each spread includes one question or topic, a brief explanation, and a Bible verse that can be used as a memory verse. There are also explanations of words which might be new to readers, like salvation, resurrection, and substitute.” (Amazon)
Older Children

Susannah Spurgeon: The Pastor’s Wife Who Didn’t Let Sickness Stop Her by Mary Mohler. “Do Great Things for God” series. “This beautifully illustrated children’s biography of Susannah Spurgeon (1832-1903) features stylish illustrations and extra facts at the back, including a biographical timeline with historical photos. It is part of a series designed to show kids that God uses ordinary people to do extraordinary things.” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

Risen Hope: The Church Throughout History by Luke Davis. This is a series of five books that are meant to help explain church history to younger readers. Each book covers a different era. “If you’re looking for a narrative-driven, engagingly-written history of the church for young teens, the Risen Hope series is for you. Meet some of the key people who God used to shape His Church, and see how He has been at work throughout history.” The age range is roughly 8-13. (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

Big Questions Series (6-Volume Set) by Chris Morphew. “Christian Studies teacher and school chaplain Chris Morphew has been answering tough questions from young people for over a decade. Big Questions is a series of fun and fast-paced books walking kids aged 9-13 through what the Bible says about life, helping them to grow in confident and considered faith. Now you can get all six books in this stylish slipcase.” Each of the six volumes addresses a different big question: What happens when we die? Why does God let bad things happen? And so on. (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

Trailblazers. You’re probably familiar with the “Trailblazers” series of short biographies for kids. The series continues to grow year by year and must now exceed 50 volumes, many of which have been bundled up into themed box sets. I believe more than a half million volumes have been sold. The newest volumes are biographies of John Wycliffe and Polycarp with notables like David Livingstone and Charles & John Wesley coming a bit later this year. The biographies are excellent and are often written by biographers who have prepared full-sized works for an adult audience (e.g. Vance Christie on David Livingstone). The age range is roughly 8-9 for read to me and 9-14 for read yourself. (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

Bible Investigators: Creation by Danika Cooley. “Bursting with 90 brain-teasing puzzles, 40 Bible passages, and 30 concepts regarding God’s creation, this lesson-and-activity book will give kids aged 8-12 skills to investigate the Bible for themselves—like a real investigator! As kids apply logic and solve challenging puzzles, they will dive deeply into Scripture and examine the Bible’s account of creation, picking up lots of skills for reading and interpreting the Bible. As well as lots of puzzles, there are journaling boxes for kids to reflect on, interpret, and apply what they have learned.” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)
Teens

The Dream Keeper Saga by Kathryn Butler. This fantasy series for young teens has now reached its fourth volume, The Quest for the Guardians. “Even though she’s only 12 years old, Lily McKinley already feels the weight of the world’s brokenness. She’s seen it in her mother’s exhaustion, her grandmother’s illness, and the cruelty of Adam, the bully at her school. But most tragically, she experienced it two months ago when her father died in a terrible accident.As an artistic daydreamer, Lily has a brilliant imagination to help her cope, but that imagination often gets her into trouble. One day, it transports her to a fantasy world called the Somnium Realm, where her father’s secret history embroils her in an epic quest. With the help of a dragon guide named Cedric, Lily battles evil shrouds, harpies, and other creatures to find her way through grief, rescue the world from evil, and discover the power of redemption.” (Amazon, Westminster Kids)

New Morning Mercies for Teens by Paul David Tripp. This is “a daily gospel devotional” that has been adapted from his ultra-popular daily devotional. “This updated edition of Paul David Tripp’s bestselling book New Morning Mercies features 366 engaging daily devotionals, adapted for teenagers. Each day includes a one-sentence, gospel-centered reading and an extended meditation, Bible verses, and a prompt for discussion or personal reflection. Tripp also includes a bonus Q&A chapter in which he briefly answers questions around relevant topics including anxiety, gender, social media, and spiritual disciplines. Focused less on behavior modification and more on helping teenagers encounter the living God, this book helps young people to fall in love with Jesus, find freedom and joy within his boundaries, and live for his glory―day in and day out.” (Amazon)

A Student’s Guide, edited by John Perritt. The “A Student’s Guide” series has been underway for some time now and, in the next month or so, will reach 18 volumes. Each of them addresses a particular issue of Christian doctrine or living. So there have been volumes on glorification and missions and volumes on dating and technology. The volumes coming along very soon deal with politics, rest, and living out Reformed theology. (Amazon, Westminster Kids)