Accountability is Not a Sign of Weakness

Accountability is Not a Sign of Weakness

Don’t allow yourself to be misled by false expectations of repentance or lies that would push you away from utilizing every means available to help you in this fight. Don’t be discouraged that you still feel tempted. Don’t think you have to prove your repentance by removing safeguards, facing down temptation, and resisting it. Instead, run away from temptation. 

“My dad said we can’t put filtering software on our computers because it would be a crutch. I need to be able to overcome pornography by growing in my trust and obedience to Jesus.”

I was stunned. This student had come to me for counseling because of his pornography problem, but his Christian father was undercutting my counsel and robbing his son of valuable tools in the fight against his sin. There are so many problems with the statement aboveI wasn’t sure where to begin when he shared these thoughts with me. I won’t be able to address everything problematic in a single blog post, but a good place to start is to rethink this unhelpful view of temptation.

One of the central problems behind a statement like this is a misunderstanding of what walking in faithful repentance looks like when it comes to the sin of pornography use. Another way of stating the faulty position of the father above is this: “If I’m genuinely repentant of my sin of lust, I won’t be tempted by lustful images. Therefore, I should be able to have unfettered access to the internet.”

The Bible offers very different counsel. First, faithfulness is not the absence of temptation. Second, demonstrating faithfulness does not come by running toward temptation and not giving in, but by putting as much space between you and the temptation as possible. Third, using means of grace like accountability or filters to help us fight sin is not weakness but wisdom.

Temptation Is Not Necessarily the Problem

Temptation is not sin. We need to be abundantly clear about this. Jesus was tempted, but He never sinned (Matt. 4:1-11; Luke 4:1-13; Heb. 4:15). Therefore, in and of itself, temptation cannot be sin. James helps us distinguish between temptation and sin in the first chapter of his letter, which lays out the process that leads to sin (James 1:14-15). He describes temptation as something that precedes and can lead to sin but is not sin itself. Sometimes we lay a heavy burden of expectation on ourselves or others who struggle with porn when we communicate that genuine repentance and faithfulness to God means that there would be no temptation toward lust at all, even if a herd of attractive naked people was to go strolling by. Walking in faithful repentance would be turning from the temptation and running toward God—both physically and in our hearts.

Fleeing from Temptation

Turning away physically is one way to say no to temptation. The Bible not only encourages us to turn away from temptation but also to avoid it, whenever and however possible. When Jesus instructs His followers to pray, He includes the petition that God would keep us from temptation (Matt. 6:13).

One of my friends is a former MMA fighter. One time when he was cutting weight before a fight, he opened a bag of his favorite chips, pulled one out, and held it in front of his face. But he didn’t eat it. He did this to show himself that he had the willpower to say no to his desire for that delicious treat.

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