During the 24 years I served in pastoral ministry, I saw a continual stream of advertisements about how to grow a bigger church. In nearly 50 years of preaching and teaching, I have heard dozens of messages on evangelism, missions, and church growth. And yet I could probably count on one hand the number of times one of these ads or messages mentioned the only verse in the Bible that essentially says, “Do this, and you will see people saved.”

The message of this verse was so important to the apostle Paul that when he specifically addresses elders in the New Testament, he communicates its essence. This is also the only verse in the Bible (that I can recall) that gives the same exhortation three times. Think it’s important?

What is the verse? First Timothy 4:16,

Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching. Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers.

For 28 years, I have turned to this text every semester on the last day of class. In the compact space of two short sentences are three imperatives and two promises. We’ll begin with the imperatives before turning to the promises.

1. ‘Keep a close watch on yourself.’

How does a minister “keep a close watch” on himself? By cultivating faithfulness to and avoiding the erosion of his devotion to Christ. How does he do this? By obedience to a command earlier in this chapter: “Train yourself for godliness” (1 Timothy 4:7). And how does he do this? By consistently and wholeheartedly practicing the biblical spiritual disciplines, especially the disciplines related to the word of God and prayer, for these are the God-given means of godliness.

Godliness — a Bible word essentially synonymous with Christlikeness, holiness, and sanctification — is cultivated by the personal and interpersonal spiritual disciplines, both positively (vivification) and negatively (mortification). In other words, these biblical habits are the means through which the Holy Spirit works to help us experience God and grow in grace as well as to defeat sin.

Remember that this command was first given to a minister (Timothy) and then by extension to all Christians. So, do not think, pastor, that while your people will become more godly by practicing the spiritual disciplines, you will become more Christlike simply by being in the ministry. The temptations and pressures of the ministry will conspire to make you more ungodly if you do not train yourself for godliness. Mentally remove everything in your life that’s related to ministry. With what is left, could it be said that you are growing more Christlike?

I strongly urge you to read Richard Baxter’s treatment of 1 Timothy 4:16 — especially his eight reasons why you need to keep a close watch on yourself — in his pastoral classic, The Reformed Pastor. Particularly note his third reason: you are exposed to greater temptations than others. Satan is not stupid. He knows that if he can make you fall, it will have a more damaging effect on the church than if he fells the guy who comes once a month and sits in the back row.

Unless a pastor — new or old — devotes himself to the scriptural means of godliness, he will cease to be a godly man. And what healthy church wants a pastor who isn’t godly?

2. ‘Keep a close watch on the teaching.’

In this pastoral imperative, “the teaching” refers to doctrine — to “the teaching” found in “the whole counsel of God” (Acts 20:27). Put another way, “Study theology, pastor!”

Even to the end of his life, Paul was an example of diligent study. Despite his thorough knowledge of the Scriptures and all he had seen and experienced as an apostle, he pled with Timothy in the final chapter of his last inspired letter, “When you come, bring . . . the books, and above all the parchments” (2 Timothy 4:13). If there were one person who did not need to study theology any further, wouldn’t you think it was Paul? And if there was one time he didn’t need to keep a close watch on his teaching, wouldn’t you think it would be just before he died? But he knew that as long as his mind was working, there was nothing better to put into it than the truth of God’s word.

It has been my observation over decades that few ministers persist in studying theology. Many stop reading books, listening to podcasts, or attending conferences designed to sharpen their theological thinking and deepen their doctrinal understanding. What has resulted from this? The words of David Wells in his 1994 book No Place for Truth are even more true today: “We now have less biblical fidelity, less interest in truth, less seriousness, less depth, and less capacity to speak the Word of God to our own generation in a way that offers an alternative to what it already thinks” (12). In times that are much more complex than 30 years ago, the church and its leaders need more theology, not less.

Churches do not rise in godliness and biblical maturity above the level of their pastor’s piety and theology.

3. ‘Persist in this.’

In other words, “persist in keeping a close watch on yourself and on the teaching.” Pastor, persevere to the end of your days in keeping a close watch on both your piety and your theology. You will never reach a level of maturity or a time in your life when you no longer need this vigilance.

Again, when Paul writes or speaks specifically to ministers, he basically repeats what he says here to Timothy. To the elders of the Ephesian church, he says, “Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock” (Acts 20:28). When he says, “and to all the flock,” we know Paul is urging them to “Keep a close watch on . . . the teaching,” because in the very next verses he warns the elders that false teachers will soon come, “not sparing the flock” — men who will “draw away the disciples after them” (verses 29–30).

To Titus, the other recipient of a Pastoral Epistle, Paul reiterates, “Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works [that is, piety], and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame” (Titus 2:7–8). His primary concern for pastors remains the same: “yourself and the teaching.” Life and doctrine. Heart and head. Fire and light. Spirit and truth. Piety and theology.

Most of us tend to lean toward one or the other, toward piety or theology. What is your own tendency? Be aware of that, and take pains to “watch” that your pursuit of one does not allow the other to wither.

And beware of the temptation to believe that after enough ministerial experience you will outgrow your need for watchfulness. I’ve been in the ministry for nearly half a century, and I need to persist in watching now as much as ever.

Promises God Makes to Pastors

First, “you will save yourself.” It’s safe to assume that Paul believed Timothy was saved, so it’s likely the apostle is reminding Timothy that a truly Christian pastor must “keep a close watch on [himself] and on the teaching” if he hopes for assurance of his final salvation. But in pursuing that assurance, pastor, remember that neither a consistent devotional life nor orthodox theology will save you. The Pharisees were pretty good at both. Not even a lifetime of faithful service in pastoral ministry will save you. Even pastors are saved by the work of Christ alone.

And just like any other Christian, pastors also need to heed the command of 2 Corinthians 13:5, “Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith.” But also like any other Christian, any pastor who spends his entire life sincerely pursuing Christ through the biblical disciplines and the truth of God in Scripture exhibits solid indications that he is saved.

Second, “you will save your hearers.” Alongside the Spirit-empowered aspect of salvation, this promise is also very reasonable. For example, who is more likely to make converts to the way of life and teaching of Gandhi? Of course, it will be someone who lives like Gandhi and teaches what Gandhi taught. In the same way, who is more likely to see people become disciples of Jesus than a man who lives like Jesus and teaches what Jesus taught?

Notice, he doesn’t promise you will see as many saved as you want, nor even that you will always know when people are saved, but he does say your ministry will result in true conversions. And I’d rather see ten people truly converted than a hundred who say they are but are not. Wouldn’t you?

Your First Calling

The “methods” of 1 Timothy 4:16 were the heart of Paul’s evangelistic, missionary, and church-growth strategies. To be a godly man — living and acting like Jesus — is essential to leading people to Jesus. Knowing and proclaiming the doctrines of Christ and salvation — that is, the gospel — is the means by which God saves people (Romans 1:16). And he promises in this verse that if you persist in doing these things, you will see people come to Christ.

Pastor, you are called first and foremost to be a man of God. Therefore, “Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching. Persist in this.”

Did Jonathan Edwards neglect his family?

What would prompt such a question as this? Is there well-known or newly discovered evidence that pastor Jonathan Edwards (1703–58) — a leader of the First Great Awakening and widely considered America’s greatest theologian — neglected his family? Are there reasons to believe he had a troubled marriage with Sarah? Did his children turn out badly?

No. Rather, it’s likely that the only reason anyone would even pose the question arises from a short but famous remark by Samuel Hopkins (1721–1823), Edwards’s first biographer.

Behind the Study Door

Hopkins, who would later become an influential theologian in his own right, once lived in the Edwards home for six months to observe and learn from the renowned minister.

In The Life and Character of the Late Reverend Mr. Jonathan Edwards (1764), Hopkins wrote that “he commonly spent thirteen hours every day in his study.” Hopkins passes immediately from the remark without so much as a word as to how Edwards spent that time. It is not hard to guess the general contours of those thirteen hours, given Edwards’s propensities and the extant sermon manuscripts and publications. Still, nowhere do we read of a routine schedule or specific details describing Edwards’s activities behind the door of his study.

That’s it. When people read Hopkins’s ten words through the lens of modern life, and then factor in time for sleeping, eating, and other matters, some conclude that Edwards must have neglected his family. Those familiar with Edwards also recall his daily four-mile round-trip visit on horseback to the Sawtooth hills west of Northampton, where he would dismount to meditate and pray while walking, as well as his habit of chopping wood for exercise. Adding it all up, even Edwards’s most loyal supporters can be prone to wonder if — as so many pastors have done — he sacrificed his family on the altar of ministry.

The title of Elisabeth Dodds’s insightful book on “the uncommon union” of Jonathan and Sarah — Marriage to a Difficult Man — doesn’t help dispel these suspicions, at least for those who know of the book but haven’t read it. But as we shall see, Dodds instead sheds a reassuring light on life in the Edwards home.

His Little Church

Readers of Edwards’s sermons on the subject of family life will find them biblically orthodox. It isn’t surprising that, from a contemporary perspective, Edwards’s instructions about the governance of a home may seem rather strict. But they were in harmony both with the Christian parental guidance of his day and the spirit of the biblical teaching on the family.

His favorite analogy of the family was that it was like “a little church.” He used the image in one of his earliest published sermons (1723) and again in his “Farewell Sermon” to the Northampton church 27 years later, saying, “A Christian family ought to be as it were a little church, consecrated to Christ, and wholly influenced and governed by his rules.” As a church should be marked by love, Christ-centeredness, and biblical order, so, said Edwards, should be the home.

In his 1739 sermon “The Importance of Revival Among Heads of Families,” Edwards warned of the “great offense” to God “if heads of families are either God’s enemies or are cold and dull in religion.” He advocated for the practice of regular family worship and the responsibility of fathers to instruct their children in the ways of the Lord. And yet, all the instruction, regardless of how faithful to Scripture, “will have little effect unless example accompanies instructions.” Thus, Edwards was well aware of the importance of being a Christlike example in the home. But he also knew that no amount of modeling or teaching was sufficient apart from the work of the Spirit in the hearts of children. Therefore, he urged the parents to “earnest prayer” for their children: “You should travail for them.”

Perhaps you’ve heard of hypocritical pastors who failed to practice in private the orthodoxy they preached in public. Edwards, however, has never been counted among them, but rather is renowned for the general congruence between his life and preaching. So, let us look elsewhere.

Uncommon and Happy Union

Why did Elisabeth Dodds refer to Edwards as “a difficult man”? It wasn’t because he was a disagreeable man or a distant man. Rather, it was because “a genius is seldom an easy husband” (31).

“As a church should be marked by love, Christ-centeredness, and biblical order, so, said Edwards, should be the home.”

In fact, Dodds argues that Edwards’s devotion to and dependence upon Sarah was one of the reasons why he would have been no easy husband. According to Dodds, Edwards often invited Sarah to join him in his late afternoon rides into the woods. There he would pour out the contents of the day’s study and sermon preparation for her consideration or seek her input on some parish problem. Although the break from her heavy domestic duties and the opportunity to be outdoors provided some physical refreshment, Dodds concluded that sometimes Sarah “must also have been singularly drained” by such intense mental demands at the end of the day.

Before the third paragraph of her book, Dodds says of Jonathan, “He was in fact a tender lover and a father whose children seemed genuinely fond of him.” Still, living with a man of such “labyrinthine character” meant their marriage was not a “radiant idyll” (i). No marriage is, even for two people as godly and well-matched as the Edwardses.

Being a pastor’s wife — especially the wife of the only pastor in town — is often difficult. Sarah knew she was scrutinized every time she left the house, down to what she wore, how much money she spent, and how her children behaved. Jonathan was always underpaid, so money was always tight, and the financial pressures increased with the birth of each of their eleven children. Add the criticism Jonathan received (which also weighed heavily on Sarah) to the problems of the church, and you have a mix that would strain the bonds of any marriage.

Yet, to the end Jonathan and Sarah loved each other and enjoyed what can only be considered a happy marriage. In fact, on his deathbed — literally in the last moments of his life — Edwards’s final words included this message to his wife of thirty years, who had not yet made the move to Princeton where Edwards was the new president: “Give my kindest love to my dear wife, and tell her that the uncommon union, which has so long subsisted between us, has been of such nature, as I trust is spiritual, and therefore will continue forever.”

Incidentally, Jonathan named his first child Sarah.

Three Meals a Day

When specifying the qualifications of an elder, the apostle Paul wrote, “He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive” (1 Timothy 3:4). Edwards met this qualification with flying colors, for each of his eleven children turned out well. Of course, pastors can (and have) kept their “children submissive” harshly and with dictatorial domination, but Edwards did it “with all dignity.” And to the point of this article, every good parent knows that neglected children seldom turn out well.

Abundant evidence proves that Edwards did not neglect his children at all. For starters, “Sarah could count on one hour a day when Edwards gave the family complete attention,” writes Dodds (49). “He made sure to save an hour at the close of each day to spend with the children.” How many of those who charge Edwards with neglect do this? Hopkins observed and wrote about this hour.

Moreover, the Jonathan Edwards Encyclopedia reports that “when [the children] were old enough, he took them with him one at a time on his journeys. He often wrote his children when traveling alone” (87). Additionally, Edwards “had the idea, unusual in those times, that girls as well as boys should be educated. . . . The girls, tutored by their father at home, learned Latin, Greek, rhetoric, and penmanship” (Marriage to a Difficult Man, 50).

But Edwards placed the greatest emphasis on the commitment required for the spiritual instruction of his family. In his prize-winning biography, George Marsden writes that Edwards

began the day with private prayers followed by family prayers, by candlelight in winter. . . . Care for his children’s souls was, of course, his preeminent concern. In morning devotions he quizzed them on Scripture with questions appropriate to their ages. . . . Each meal was accompanied by household devotions. (133, 321)

Each meal! Note that this also implies that he ate three meals a day face-to-face with his family. If we knew nothing else of his interaction with his children, what we know of the gathering of his “little church” for family worship several times each day demolishes any suggestion that Edwards neglected his family.

‘Thirteen Hours Every Day’

Although the Edwardses lived in a two-story home, it was by no means large by today’s standards. Often as many as fifteen people lived there. That alone generated significant noise to interrupt a study in which there was no streaming music, white-noise device, or noise-canceling earphones to insulate Edwards from the distractions.

And though he was there thirteen hours a day (where else would he have gone to do his work?), he would have emerged as needed to quell a sibling dispute or address any other issue that required his attention. Moreover, the children were not forbidden to enter the study when necessary. After his evening hour with the children, Edwards retreated to his study for another hour or so. At bedtime Sarah would join him there, and they would close the day together in prayer.

So, when Hopkins writes that Edwards was in his study thirteen hours every day, it’s wrong to envision him there totally alone the entire time (that’s also where he counseled church members), completely disengaged from his family. In fact, from everything we know, he probably had more personal contact and interaction with his large family than almost any father does today.

Finally, although this article was specifically about Jonathan, I cannot close without emphasizing that much of the character and success of the Edwards children was, of course, attributable to the love, nurture, and training of the remarkable Sarah. And I’m sure Jonathan would agree. Together they truly had an “uncommon union,” and from it resulted an uncommon family.

Two years ago, I wrote in “Ten Questions for a New Year” that the close of one year, and the beginning of a new one, is an ideal time to “consider your ways” (Haggai 1:5). In other words, many find it an appropriate season for reviewing our walk with Jesus and reconsidering our priorities. To that end, I suggest ten more questions.

1. What’s the most important decision you need to make?

While some of us have major decisions already looming before us, many do not. Of course, even in a “normal” year, significant decisions typically arise. But what is one decision you may not be forced to make but would be wise to make? Perhaps it relates to your spiritual life or your family life; perhaps it’s one that will impact someone’s eternity. The decision may regard one of the questions below, so you may find it helpful to return to this question after you finish the others.

“What is one decision you may not be forced to make but would be wise to make?”

2. How can you simplify your life?

Most everyone I know feels overwhelmed. You might be thinking, My whole life needs simplifying! And maybe you’re right. But it can also feel overwhelming to think of simplifying everything, and that’s likely to result in simplifying nothing. To adapt the old adage, the thousand-mile journey to simplify your entire life begins with the first step. Identify the one area where simplifying could have the greatest effect, and then determine one step you can make in that direction. Fight the inertia with one practical, simplifying change.

3. What’s the most important need you feel burdened to meet?

The need might relate to a ministry or a person in your church, your neighborhood, or your city, or even to something on a larger scale, such as disaster relief, injustice, world hunger, or global missions. You can’t meet every need you see, but what’s one step you could take?

4. What habit would you most like to establish?

Perhaps this question sounds like merely an old-fashioned New Year’s resolution. But the fact remains that each of us can almost immediately identify a regular practice that, if it became ingrained into our routines, would bless us and others and bring glory to God. Perhaps it would be the addition of some simple spiritual discipline. Maybe the Holy Spirit has been prompting you to begin a new habit in one of the usual areas of consideration, such as exercise, diet, or sleep. Or it could be something like fresh diligence in housekeeping, marriage or family life, or the use of technology. Either way, pray, make a plan, and start!

5. Whom do you most want to encourage?

Pinpoint one person — a family member, church member, friend, neighbor, or coworker — who has been overwhelmed by circumstances or burdens. Resolve to say an encouraging word to that person, perhaps as often as you see him or her.

6. What is your most important financial goal, and what is the most important step toward it?

Goals for financial stewardship typically relate to giving to God’s kingdom work, reducing debt, saving for something special, or generating a new income stream. But it could be that you need to develop a better biblical and practical foundation for managing your money. Consider reading a book on the subject, asking for counsel from a wise Christian friend, or talking with a professional. Decide which to put at the top of your list, and make a measurable move forward.

7. What’s the single best step you can take to improve your work life?

The Bible encourages not only work, but good work. Proverbs 22:29 says, “Do you see a man skilled in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before obscure men.” It’s common to fall into the routines and deadlines of our employment and develop a mindset of just, Go to work and do my job. How can you become one who is better “skilled in his work” this year? Determine to improve one work-related skill and add more value to your labor.

“How can you become one who is better ‘skilled in his work’ this year?”

8. What’s one way you can bless your pastor (or another who ministers to you)?

As someone with 24 years of full- or part-time pastoral ministry, and 28 years of experience training ministers, I can testify that most pastors receive complaints and criticisms every week. Often, they are stung several times a week. Resolve this year to become the kind of church member who encourages those whom God uses to minister to you. Be specific about some insightful comment they made that was helpful to you. Tell them that their faithfulness in ministry is an ongoing encouragement in your own walk with Jesus.

9. What’s one step you can take to enrich your family’s spiritual legacy?

The most important step you can take is to provide an example of consistent Christian character in your personal life and commitment to your local body of Christ. You want your children and grandchildren to see you maintaining your devotional life at home and serving in your church. So maybe enriching your spiritual legacy begins with a practical step in one of these spheres. Beyond this, perhaps nothing else could make a greater impact on your family’s future spiritual life than committing to a practice of simple but regular family worship.

You might also consider other ideas for bringing Christ to your children and grandchildren. For example, you could send them emails with a spiritual bent. You could handwrite a note or letter, which they’ll possibly keep since they rarely receive anything written by hand. You could keep a journal that records your spiritual journey, prayers for them, or other reflections for their benefit. Or you could use a different Bible each year in your devotional reading and include your insights as well as notes to a child or grandchild, and then present it to him or her at the end of the year.

I record a video for my daughter and each grandchild on their birthdays, recounting some of the highlights in their lives and our family in the past year, reminding them of my love, and expressing my prayers for them. I have a folder in my file cabinet with important information my family will need after my death, and there I tell them the location of these videos on my computer.

10. What book, in addition to the Bible, do you most want to read?

Have the increasing pressures of your life crowded out the benefits and pleasures of reading? This next year, could you choose one book you know you’d really find helpful and read just one page per day? By reading one page per day, you may read the equivalent of two full-length books. That may not sound like much, but it’s far better than not reading at all. Moreover, by some accounts, this would place you above half the American population in the number of books read each year.

Meet the Year

If you’ve found these questions thought-provoking, perhaps you’ll want to print them or copy them into a journal so you can reflect on them more thoroughly and prayerfully. Consider incorporating them into your devotional time today or tomorrow, or just setting aside a few quiet minutes when you can ponder them with a pen and a cup of coffee.

If we’re not intentional, we may find that we spent more time thinking about our Christmas list than about the entire upcoming year of our lives.