Whatever the situation, when our children are hard-pressed with troubles and trials, we can be on the lookout for ways to come alongside to bear their burden (Gal. 6:2). This, too, takes wisdom because every situation and child are different. There is no one-size-fits-all playbook here, so godly wisdom is needed to meet each child where he or she is. As we gauge the gravity of the trial and a particular child’s capacity to handle it, wisdom means tailoring our engagement to the situation.

Seeing our children suffer through trials can be extremely difficult. Even parents who are well-equipped to cope with their own problems often find themselves feeling helpless when their child is the one hurting. How can we shepherd our children through adversity in a healthy, God-honoring way? When troubles find our children, here are three ways we can support them.
Provide a Faithful Presence
As parents and caregivers, when we see our children suffering, our impulse is to jump immediately into action mode. Sometimes urgent intervention is the right and necessary thing to do. But it is also often the case that children who are facing trials need our faithful presence more than our problem-solving skills. We know from our own experience that in times of turmoil, sometimes we simply want to be comforted by the presence of a loved one—someone who will patiently sit with us rather than rush to fix us, someone with whom we feel safe. Our children yearn for that type of refuge as well, and one of the highest privileges of being a parent is that we get to reflect this aspect of God’s good character in our homes.
If parenting can be compared to shepherding, this part of our role is the one in which the shepherd comes to know his sheep so well that his mere presence is a comfort to the flock. Likewise, there is a way in which we can embody the peace of God while pointing our children to Him as our ultimate rock and refuge (Ps. 18:2). When crisis barges into our children’s lives, we have an opportunity to be there for them in a way that communicates a calming reassurance over their distress. Before we even lift a finger to help resolve the crisis at hand, our presence and demeanor can show our children that we are with them and for them and, even better, so is God. In times of need, we can remind our children that the Lord is near to all who call on Him (Ps. 145:18).
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As we strive to bring the Word of God to bear in every aspect of our homes, Deuteronomy prompts us to consider the flow of that faithful labor. Moses exhorts, “You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise” (Deut. 6:7). With our lives centered on the truth of God’s Word, obedience flows outward as we live in the light of God’s path. One way that we demonstrate this disposition is by being diligent to pass God’s Word on to the next generation.

When Christian parents are struggling to find consistency in God’s Word as they disciple their children, Deuteronomy 6 is one of my favorite passages to consider with them. Verses 4–9, known as the Shema (from the first word in Hebrew, translated “hear”), are a beacon of clarity and practical encouragement. Drawing from this passage, we can look at the foundation, the flow, and the family essential to the holistic application of God’s Word in our homes.

First, look at the foundation of family discipleship. If we as Christian parents aim to better apply the Word of God in our homes, what’s our starting point? According to Moses here in Deuteronomy, we begin with our hearts and eyes fixed upward on God, not outward on the task before us:
“Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart.” (Deut. 6:4–6)
As we seek to disciple our children, God Himself is the foundation of our mission, not our own plans or efforts.
The Shema gives us a direct charge from God to base our lives on the revealed truth of who He is. In the Shema, God uses His covenant name to clearly declare Himself to be the one true God, the promise- keeping Redeemer who has humbled Himself to bless His people. That’s our starting point. We receive a truth external to us, a truth that should never cease to startle us: Almighty God wants a genuine relationship with us, and He is willing to instruct us, guide us, and ultimately substitute Himself for us so that He might grant us the righteousness needed to accomplish that union (2 Cor. 5:21). Our love for God is rooted in and grows out of that reality. It is all-encompassing; it occupies our entire being—heart, soul, everything, with all our might. There is no compartmentalization of our response to God. He will have all of us or none of us.
Applied more specifically to family discipleship, the firm foundation of the unique worthiness of God helps us clarify the aim of our efforts.

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