It is hopeless and joy-robbing to tell someone this is who you are, just don’t do this. To a “gay person” telling them NOT to live out who they are at the core of what they believe their existence is, is to tell them not to be human. It’s irrational. It’s hopeless. It’s incoherent to them.  That is soul crushing and joy robbing and amounts to legalism. As if Christ simply wants us to behave and doesn’t care about a heart change.   And it’s unbiblical.  The Scriptures know of no core category of personhood based on sexual desire.

Note: We as a Church need to readily admit that people who have identified as gay or admitted that they struggle with Same-Sex Attraction (SSA) have been mistreated in horrendous ways in and by the Church.  As a Christian, that grieves me. My intent in writing this article is not to add to that hurt but to provide clarity.  In that,  I write this out of a heart of love for the many people I know and am friends with who experience this struggle.  There is real hope in the Gospel of Jesus Christ for people with this struggle.  However, Side B Gay Christianity is not the answer. 
For most people Side-B Gay Christianity (also Side-B Christianity) is a new term, and it is one that should be shocking and concerning.  That a “brand” of Christianity would be categorized based on sexuality is antithetical to what Christianity is.[1]  But to those of us familiar with these debates it comes as no surprise at all.  Once a group creates another category of personhood and being, it is only natural to apply that grid to all of life and every other societal structure.
What is Side B Gay Christianity?
As succinctly as possible, I’ll briefly and loosely define two terms.
Side-A Gay Christianity, observing that there was very little success in people actually changing “orientation,” teaches that it is permissible and good for “gay people” to be in same-sex marriages and therefore sexual relationships because that is who they are. They view the Scripture’s prohibitions on homosexual behavior [2] not to apply to committed same-sex relationships.
Side-B Gay Christianity, recognizing that Side-A is not faithful to the Scriptures, says that while “being gay” or having a “gay orientation,” is a valid category of personhood and identity, Scripture clearly forbids the acting out of those desires. They advocate for a “gay but celibate” way of life.
So what is the Problem?
On the surface the Side-B option seems to be a good. They do after all uphold the Biblical Sexual ethic as sex being limited to 1 man and 1 woman within the bounds of marriage. That’s good, right?  Well, in a legalistic way, yes.  But that isn’t the whole story.  The Side-B position has a false view of anthropology (man) and ontology (being) and this often leads to a false eschatology (end times view of our glorification). In that, this is a Theological issue.
While there are a range of troubling and sinful beliefs that fall under the Side-B umbrella [3], one thing is consistent. Sexuality becomes a category of personhood and being.  It’s as if they have created a 3rd type of human. There are straight natural born males and straight natural born females and then LGBTQ humans.  Or perhaps they have 2 categories of personhood straight people and LGBTQ people.  Really that doesn’t adequately express it and indeed nothing can which is why there is no end to the gender-sexuality combinations in society and psychology.
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[1] Rev. Albert Mohler highlights the issues with Side-B Gay Christianity and Revoice Theology
[2] Bible Verses Prohibiting Homosexual Behavior: Leviticus 18:22, 20:13, Romans 1:18-32, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, 1 Timothy 1:10
[3] Here is an article highlighting in a positive light the troubling beliefs of Side B Gay Christianity, including it being a gift,  a God-given identity, aiding being able to see beauty, providing a beneficial outlook on aesthetics, culture, and worldview, its own community, and aiding in spiritual (romantic yet celibate) relationships among other things.

We are called to love the church, but also the specific people in the church that he has given us to enjoy closer relationship with. When that gets hard, we need to remember the God dwells among us. We were each saved by the blood of Christ, given faith by the Father, and have been indwelled by the Spirit. This means that even in the darkest of times, even when separation or distance might be called for, that we do so prayerfully and patiently considering God’s call upon our lives to love his people.

Dear Tim,
Thank you so much for your gracious letter, it will come as no shock that your reminder of Jesus’ example of faithful suffering struck my heart. This exhortation has stayed with me ever since I read your letter, “[Jesus] gave us an example of how to suffer, so let’s apprentice ourselves to him in this too.”
Thank you for challenging me to imitate him again.
Here is our passage for today:
“I exhort you all, therefore, to yield obedience to the word of righteousness, and to exercise all patience, such as you have seen before your eyes, not only in the case of the blessed Ignatius, and Zosimus, and Rufus, but also in others among yourselves, and in Paul himself, and the rest of the apostles. [Do this] in the assurance that all these have not run in vain, but in faith and righteousness, and that they are [now] in their due place in the presence of the Lord, with whom also they suffered. For they loved not this present world, but Him who died for us, and for our sakes was raised again by God from the dead.”
“I exhort you all, therefore, to yield obedience to theword of righteousness, and to exercise all patience”
The title in the translator gave to this passage was “Patience Inculcated.” Inculcated isn’t a word that we hear used very much in common parlance, but I think in this case it’s a very poignant one. The has a kind of dual meaning; it evokes a sense of a parent instilling virtues in their children that they’ll indwell for life, but it also has an element of repetition. Patience is a fruit of the Spirit, and is therefore something that believers, both young and old, should expect to possess in some measure, however in order for that fruit to grow it needs to be constantly fed and watered.
I have gotten in the habit, when people have come to me for advice during times of particular personal or relational stress, of asking whether they have recently asked God to give them more patience. I have about a 90% hit rate. One of the best ways for us to grow in patience isn’t simply by being told, but rather to have regular “system updates” by meeting difficult people and situations. This inculcates the kind of patience fitting of those obedient to the word of righteousness.
It’s no wonder then that Polycarp’s passage on patience is written within the context of relation, both to the broader family of the saints, but also more specifically to those in our personal spheres. This gives us people to be patient with, and people to patiently imitate.
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We want to consider the most important aspect of running our Christian race well: keeping our eyes on the prize. Yes, we need proper motivation and encouragement to run, we need to rid ourselves of things that would encumber our progress, we need to prepare for the long haul. But none of this matters if we don’t keep our eyes on the prize. In this case, that doesn’t mean a trophy or a finish line. It means “looking to Jesus.”

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith. (Hebrews 12:1-2a)
The above is one of my all-time favorite passages in Scripture. Indeed, in numerous places in Scripture the Christian life is compared to the effort and exertion of a race (1 Cor. 9:24; 2 Tim. 4:7). These few words from Hebrews teach us four things about what it means to run the Christian’s race well.
1. Run the race well by finding your motivator to run.
These verses begin with laying out some of the motivation we have to run our Christian race well. That motivation is the example of those who have run it before us. Remember, this verse follows immediately on the heels of the “Hall of Faith” in chapter 11. There the author describes a whole host of committed believers who have run their race well. They are to be our examples (for instance: “let us also lay aside…” that is, we should run the same way they have).
More than being our examples, they are also our cheerleaders! In chapter 12 they are now referred to as “a cloud of witnesses.” Picture running a race on a track and the stands on every side filled with people who are cheering for you. Though we can’t see it, that’s what’s going on in the Christian life. We are surrounded by the saints who have gone on before, and that is meant to encourage us to run well.
If you have ever run a race or sat on the sidelines and watched one, you know the power of hearing people cheer one another on. Someone who is winded and barely able to lift their feet suddenly hears the voices of supporters rallying them on, and just like that they have renewed vigor and motivation to keep going! As we run our race, we must remember the example and encouragement set by all believers who have run before us, not just pillars of the faith, like Abraham and Moses (although certainly them). We should also remember others whom God has graciously placed in our lives: parents, siblings, pastors, teachers, friends, and mentors. Let their godly example motivate us to run well.
My wife recently completed a half marathon, and she explained to me the importance of finding another runner who can be your pacesetter—someone whose speed will challenge your own. You make it your goal to stick behind them during the race. This illustrates a biblical principle. The apostle Paul said,

Brothers, join in imitating me, and keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us. (Phil. 3:17; emphasis added)

So, who in your life can be your “pacesetter”? Who will you join in imitating their Christian life? Who will be your example and encouragement? Who will motivate you to run that race that is before you? Answering that question is the first step in running well.
2. Run the race well by casting off your weights.
Second, we see that in order to run well we must cast off our weights. Lighter means faster. If runners want to perform their very best, they will make sure they are not weighed down by a cumbersome load. In this context, the word “weight” could refer to extra layers of clothes that slow us down or get in the way. Flowing robes aren’t the attire for running. The analogy to the spiritual is explained in the next clause: “and sin which clings so closely.” Trying to run the Christian race with sin clinging to us is like trying to run a marathon in a ballroom gown while carrying a backpack filled with bricks.
Sin is a weight that ties us down and prevents us from serving Jesus to the best of our ability. Remember Levi the tax collector? His profession was rife with corruption, and it kept him from following after the Savior; but when he was called by Christ, we read that he “left everything” (Luke 5:28). We need to have that same sort of determination.
We cannot afford to be hindered in a race that has such important consequences, so we must cast sin off from us.
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