Christian, when you have to pass through times of difficulties, times of trial, times of pain, you can gaze toward that distant horizon believing and knowing that the struggles you are enduring now are not only deepening your longing for heaven but also seasoning heaven to make it even better, even sweeter, even more precious. For as the songwriters say, the calm will be the better for the storms that we endure.

There was no silence like the silence that descended over the trenches of Western Europe on the morning of November 11, 1918. At exactly 11 AM, an armistice came into effect that brought a halt to all fighting on land, sea, and air. Never had silence been better appreciated than when that silence marked the end of the four brutal years we now call the First World War. In its own way, the silence was a song that told of the cessation of hostilities and the dawning of peace.
Matt Boswell and Matt Papa once wrote a hymn about the beauty of stillness, of calmness, of peace. “Christ the Sure and Steady Anchor” is meant to comfort Christians in times of trial and suffering. Its lyrics tell about the fury of life’s storms when winds of doubt are blowing and sinking hopes are few. They tell about the tempests of temptation, the floods of unbelief, and the waves of death. Through it all they promise Christ as the sure and steady anchor and proclaim, that with God’s help, “I will hold fast to the anchor; / It shall never be removed.”
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If we wish to attract and grow genuine disciples, we must offer much more than inspiring civil religion, spiritual pep rallies, and pageantry. We must demonstrate a kind of faith known not for power and “success” but for weakness; scandalous not for hypocrisy but for hardship.
The church stands in need of reformation once again. Our pastors and our people need revival.
I say this as a Lutheran who has never been a fan of the slogan ecclesia reformata, semper reformanda (the church reformed, always being reformed). I do not think churches should always be reforming. Our profession and liturgy are often just right. I’m a rather traditional guy. I think the summaries of Scripture in our Protestant confessions remain relevant today—and, for the most part, true. They’re revisable, of course, based on the Word of God. They do not bear the authority that Holy Scripture does. But only modernists believe we should always be reforming them. Only the most trendy and rootless evangelicals want to reinvent the church incessantly.
I also say this as a historian of Christianity. I teach students all the time about seasons of despair and renewal in the church. I’m not the first to point out problems to God’s people. Church history is full of “prophets” pushing gloom and doom on others, making outsized claims about their generation’s sins.
Our Churches Are in Crisis
Still, our churches have taken a special kind of beating in recent years. And even traditionalists like me think revival is required when so many of us suffer from cheap grace, tribalism, spiritual laziness, and “gospels” that have displaced the cross with self-absorption. Since the time of the Reformation, we have debated when and in what conditions we need change—difficult change that requires hard work and a risky sort of witness. It’s been concluded that in times of acute persecution, when the gospel is at stake, when the church is on the ropes, we must stand up and fight for costly discipleship.
This debate dates back to the mid-16th century row when Lutherans, especially, wondered whether they had arrived at a status confessionis (“a situation of confession”). This is such a time. Many churches are in crisis—especially in the West, but in other places too. Attendance has dropped. An alarming number of young people doubt whether church membership even matters. Some of their elders seem to care more about wealth and power, their status and control of worldly narratives and systems, than about following Jesus. Of course, idolatry is not unique to seniors. Its tentacles are reaching into every generation.
Many Christians, young and old, have misplaced priorities. Many of us spend more time on sports than we do reading the Bible. We make more time for media than meeting others’ needs. We pray very little, and not very hard. Our plans for retirement are mostly R&R. We are hedging our bets regarding life in the world to come, investing more of our free time and excess income in mundane pastimes than in the kingdom of God. Many of us today would pay as much we can afford to extend our worldly lives for just a few more months. To use the language of the Puritans, we don’t seem to have weaned our affections from the world.
This is not lost on others. Many wonder how to account for the discrepancy they see between what Christians profess and what we do with our lives. They wonder just how deeply we believe what we say. And if we don’t believe it, why should anybody else? Maybe churches aren’t worth all the time they require. There are better ways to live our best life now than spending hours per week in institutions that too often apply a thin coat of God-talk and tepid spirituality to weak and rotting boards.
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The Bible gives the true diagnosis and solution for any gender-related sin and/or suffering: heart transformation through Christ’s forgiveness and resurrection power in His Spirit, which enables our minds and beliefs to be renewed by truth, our broken hearts and distress to be healed, our gender struggles to be brought under God’s care, and ultimately completely eradicated in the life to come. Christ alone bore our shame and sin in His body on the cross.

One of the ways we disciple kids so that in everything, God may be glorified through Jesus Christ (1 Pet. 4:10-12) is by speaking God’s truth about gender issues with clarity. Discipling your kids to have biblical words and concepts planted in their hearts and minds is a foundational way to equip them to think and discern wisely as they face personal struggles and false teaching.[1]
Two Types of Conversations to Have
As you seek to make deposits in your kids’ hearts and minds slowly yet steadily, there are two conversational pathways to keep in mind.
First, pray about being ready to engage in “As You Go” talks about gender. Just like it sounds, these conversations can spring up in the normal flow of daily life. Basically, take notice of what you (and they) see and hear online, what is happening with their friends, gender-neutral clothes, words and phrases they hear like genderqueer, non-binary, etc.
These brief, in-the-moment interactions are a way to follow the exhortation of God’s Word, “You shall therefore lay up these words of mine in your heart and in your soul, and you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall teach them to your children, talking of them when you are sitting in your house, and when you are walking by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise” (Deut. 11:18-19).
The other category is “Intentional Topical Conversations.” These age-appropriate conversations are planned, brief, and focused on specific gender-related issues—not a deep dive into the entirety of what it means to be male and female image bearers, the differences between men and women, or all the nuances of transgenderism.
The following five ideas provide an outline for you to study personally and then work through steadily over time with your child. Remember, there is a battle raging, and you are girding them with God’s truth so that they can, “in all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which [they] can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one” (Eph. 6:16).
Five Key Biblical Topics about Gender
1. God created the world and us; we are either male or female by His design.
In Genesis 1:26-27, we learn that He created us, and we are born either of two possible genders: male or female. God’s creation of us gives us an unchangeable identity, value, and purpose.
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