During my years as a pastor, I’ve witnessed a range of situations in which people confess they cannot forgive: the man who was abused as a child, the wife of an alcoholic husband. They’re undoubtedly right, apart from Jesus. Because God alone can fully heal our wounds and revive the dead, we need him to move our hearts to forgive. Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34). God calls us to do likewise, nearly impossible as it may seem. When this kind of mercy appears, our merciless world sits up and takes notice.

Editors’ note: “Difficult but Beautiful Doctrines” is a long-form series that draws readers’ attention to the glory and necessity of theological truths people in the post-Christian West often find hard to accept.
Last year, Vito Perrone was formally offered the job to lead the public schools of Easthampton, Massachusetts. Perrone was well qualified as the former Easthampton High School principal and as the interim superintendent of schools in nearby West Springfield.
Unfortunately for Perrone, he sent an email to the school committee over contract negotiations that caused an uproar. Perrone’s sin? He addressed the women as “ladies,” which he meant as a sign of respect. However, this was deemed an unforgivable microaggression. Perrone was told that “the fact that he didn’t know that as an educator was a problem.”
The job offer was rescinded.
In recent years, the minefields of cancel culture have blown up on formerly anonymous school officials as well as on well-known figures like J. K. Rowling and journalist Kevin Williamson. As New York Times columnist Ross Douthat observed, “Cancellation, properly understood, refers to an attack on someone’s employment and reputation by a determined collective of critics, based on an opinion or an action that is alleged to be disgraceful and disqualifying.”
Cancellation is possible these days for anyone who commits actions or makes statements that one group or another considers beyond the pale. But what happens when cancel culture meets the breathtaking mercy of God’s kingdom?
Cancel Culture’s Perilous Cliff
Our merciless moment reminds me of Les Misérables, the 19th-century classic by Victor Hugo, and especially of the character Javert, who weaponized his narrow interpretation of justice. Hugo wrote, “[Police inspector Javert] had nothing but disdain, aversion, and disgust for all who had once overstepped the bounds of the law.” He sought to cancel all transgressors—especially the former convict Jean Valjean.
Javert’s greatest strength was his biggest weakness. Driven by a Pharisee-like commitment to the letter of the law, he couldn’t overlook the slightest infraction. “Though Javert’s toe-the-line mentality is often appropriate and admirable,” writes Bob Welch, “it becomes a millstone for him—and society at large—when used without restraint.”
Our cancel culture has brought us to the same perilous cliff. As Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn said, “A society which is based on the letter of the law and never reaches any higher is taking very scarce advantage of the high level of human possibilities.”
Worse, the merciless approach of cancel culture drives us away from what sinful people like you and me most need: mercy.
Seemingly Impossible Forgiveness
God’s kingdom provides a surer foundation. As the Lord said, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy” (Matt. 5:7). It sounds simple, but the implications should awe us.
Peter once asked Jesus, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” (18:21). Peter was proud of his far-reaching forgiveness, having exceeded the accepted norm. But Jesus famously responded, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy seven times” (v. 22). The lavish extent of divine mercy almost seems irresponsible.
During my years as a pastor, I’ve witnessed a range of situations in which people confess they cannot forgive: the man who was abused as a child, the wife of an alcoholic husband. They’re undoubtedly right, apart from Jesus. Because God alone can fully heal our wounds and revive the dead, we need him to move our hearts to forgive.
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Although God does not desire the salvation of the reprobate, we may declare with full confidence and without equivocation: “God came to save sinners, like you and like me. Come now, receive and rest Christ as he is freely offered to you this day and you will be saved!”

Q. What is effectual calling?A. Effectual calling is the work of God’s Spirit, whereby, convincing us of our sin and misery, enlightening our minds in the knowledge of Christ, and renewing our wills, he doth persuade and enable us to embrace Jesus Christ, freely offered to us in the gospel.WSC Q&A 31
Moreover, it is the promise of the gospel that whoever believes in Christ crucified shall not perish but have eternal life. This promise, together with the command to repent and believe, ought to be announced and declared without differentiation or discrimination to all nations and people, to whom God in his good pleasure sends the gospel.Canons of Dort 2.5
The free offer of the gospel (abbreviated “free offer”) has meant different things at different times. From a confessional standpoint, it can only mean that God sincerely offers salvation to all who repent and believe. The meaning is at best narrow. The confessions do not speak in terms of God’s desire for all men to be saved; they merely teach that God promises the gift of everlasting life to all who would turn from self to Christ. This promise of life through faith is sincere. It is a genuine offer. If you believe, you will be saved. This gospel is to go out to all men everywhere.
Arminians are often quick to point out that the free offer is inconsistent with Calvinism. They reason that if the offer of the gospel is sincere and to go out to all people without exception, then God must desire the salvation of all people without exception. Otherwise, they say, the offer isn’t sincere. How can God desire the salvation of all men without exception if God as the ultimate decider of man’s salvation chooses to pass over some? In other words, Arminians reason that unless God desires to save all men, which they observe does not comport with Calvinism, the free offer of life through faith is insincere when given to the reprobate. Their axiom is that a sincere gospel offer implies a sincere desire to see the offer accepted, a well-meant offer. More on that in a moment.
The OPC’s Majority Report
The Orthodox Presbyterian Church (OPC), representative of possibly most Calvinists today on the matter of the free offer, under the leadership of John Murray and Ned Stonehouse, adopted as a majority position the Arminian view that God desires the salvation of all men. While still holding fast to the Reformed view of predestination, the OPC affirmed the view that that the free offer cannot adequately be disassociated from a divine desire of salvation for all men without exception. In other words, such Calvinists assert that the genuineness of the gospel offer presupposes God’s desire that all embrace Christ.
Subsequently, the free offer has taken on the additional meaning of a well-meant offer, or desire, that the reprobate turn and be saved. Accordingly, a major difference between Arminians and such Calvinists as these is on the question of consistency.
Back to first principles. What makes an offer genuine or sincere?
Can we judge whether an offer is genuine or sincere simply based on whether it is true or not? If God intends to keep his promise, then isn’t the offer genuine? With respect to the gospel, if one meets the condition of faith, he will one day enter the joy of Lord. Isn’t that enough to make the offer of salvation sincere?
Let’s do some basic theology…
What does it mean that God desires the salvation of the reprobate? Are we to believe that God desires the reprobate to do something he cannot do, namely regenerate himself and grant himself union with Christ? Or, is that to check our Calvinism at the door? Isn’t it Jesus who saves? Isn’t salvation of God after all? At best, if we are to remain consistent with our Calvinism, then wouldn’t it follow that to argue for a well-meant offer of the gospel we’d have to posit that God desires that he himself would regenerate the reprobate unto existential union with Christ? After all, when God desires the salvation of the elect, his desire is fulfilled not through sinners giving life to themselves but by God recreating sinners in Christ according to his predestinating decree of salvation.
Aside from the question of whether God desires that unchosen persons act contrary to the decree, what does it mean for God to desire that he himself act contrary to how he determined he would act? Of course, I know no Calvinist who affirms the well-meant offer of the gospel who would say that God desires that he had elected all unto salvation, or anything like that. Yet if man cannot turn himself, as Calvinism clearly affirms, then isn’t the implication of a well-meant offer that God desires that he would turn those he has determined not to save?
Simply stated, since Calvinism affirms total depravity, wouldn’t it stand to reason from a Calvinistic perspective that if God desires someone’s salvation, God must desire that he save that person? Accordingly, the questions that should be considered in this regard are either (a) “Does God desire the reprobate to turn himself and live?” Or (b), “Does God desire that he himself turn the reprobate so that he can live?”
Given that man is blind and deaf to spiritual things and cannot do anything to to turn himself Godward, how are we not strictly dealing with the theological plausibility of (b), that God desires to turn the reprobate contrary to what he has already decreed? If TULIP is true, then (a) would seem to be a non-starter.
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In prayer, the motives and desires of my fellow brothers and sisters are on display. I gain insight into the deep wells of their faith. I see their heart of compassion. I hear their love for the lost. I discern their affection for Christ. I perceive their steadfast faith. We gain understanding of one another, and that understanding is critical for genuine, durable love.

Every believer desires spiritual intimacy with other believers. We may call it fellowship, community, or doing life together. God didn’t make us to be lone rangers. He saved us into the church. He called us out of the kingdom of darkness and into local expressions of the body of Christ.
And yet, spiritual community is still hard to come by. It doesn’t happen by accident. It comes as a gift from God, and he usually gives it as we intentionally cultivate Christian affection and mutual understanding. So, how might we begin cultivating this kind of life together?
One proven way to this kind of life together is that we pray together. What better way to be more united with fellow believers than to gather and bare our hearts before the throne of God together? What an opportunity and privilege! We get to go to him in prayer.
Shared Prayer Transforms Churches
Shared experiences — a concert, a vacation, an adventure — create a bond. Those memories often create deeper, more enduring affection. They can be a relational glue that holds people together. Dates and vacations with my wife have reinforced our marriage for times when life gets hard. These shared memories create tenderness, understanding, and love. In the church, similar kinds of shared life can lead to mutual appreciation, unity, and trust. I love my fellow elders more when we have endured trials together, fighting side by side in spiritual battle.
Gathered prayer can be that shared experience in a church. I’m not advocating for any particular program or event, but for prayer (formal and informal) to fill your church and bind you together. You might think of these prayer times as the furnace room of the church. Heat and warmth radiate out when God’s people gather together to pray. I’ve seen firsthand how this shared dependence on God transforms the ethos and culture of churches.
Each Sunday morning in our church, a small group gathers in the prayer room. Service will not start for another 45 minutes, but communion with the Lord has begun. We gather to call upon God to work for his glory and purposes. We sing together of his grace revealed in Christ. We lay hands on the preacher and ask for God’s word to run. We lift up our suffering saints, pleading that they would find comfort. We pray for our visitors and for our people, for our neighborhoods and for the nations. We cry out for mercy, and we confess our sins. It’s a holy moment. No fanfare, no fireworks, but again and again, we see God come, meet us, and answer our prayers.
These times of prayer together create Christlike affection for one another.
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