Today’s blog is sponsored by the D3 Youth Conference, March 8-9, 2024 at Boyce College in Louisville, KY.
Some words become so familiar they risk losing their meaning. For Christians, the term “disciple” carries just such a risk. We read about Jesus calling forth disciples in the pages of the Gospels. We recognize the command to “make disciples of every nation” in the Great Commission. We sign up for discipleship programming at our churches. But what exactly do we mean when we speak of being a disciple of Jesus?
Early in the Gospel accounts (Mk. 2:18), we see a recognition that Jesus’s disciples live differently from the disciples of other teachers or schools. The disciples of John the Baptist ask Jesus why his followers don’t fast like those of John or the Pharisees. Jesus’s response clarifies that his disciples live differently because his coming represents an inbreaking of a new sort of kingdom. Whereas the disciples of other groups primarily reflect the teaching of a great master or school, Jesus’s disciples reflect his relationship to the Father and share in his power for ministry.
A right relationship with Jesus grounds our life lived as his disciple.Share
Everyone is a disciple of someone to some degree. Whether you follow the latest new age teacher, model your life after a guru on the manosphere, or just consider yourself a devoted Swiftie, we are all pupils of some sort of life teaching. And in a day when content has become so accessible, we can be influenced by more teachers than any generation in history. Considering our current reality, the question “What is a disciple” has never been more important to answer faithfully. 
When Jesus gathered his disciples in Mark 3:13, he “called to him those whom he desired, and they came to him.” First and foremost, Jesus’s disciples are summoned to be with him. The empowerment for ministry that will come to the disciples flows from the relationship the disciples have with Jesus. Such will be the same for us. A right relationship with Jesus grounds our life lived as his disciple.
During the upcoming D3 Youth Conference, your student will learn what it means to be a disciple, and in turn, understand their role in making disciples of others. Join us March 8-9 on the campus of Boyce College in Louisville to explore topics such as these:

How Do I Follow Jesus in a Digital Age?

How Spiritual Disciplines Motivate Our Hearts Toward Holiness

The Missional Heart of a Disciple

Space is limited so secure your student’s registration today!
REGISTER NOW FOR D3

I’ve come to the conclusion that Aileen and I parent weirdly. But I’ve also come to the conclusion that so does everyone else. When each of us looks at other parents, there are almost invariably some components of their parenting we would love to imitate, but others that strike us as, well, a little bit weird. This is why it is rare, or perhaps even impossible, to find a parenting book that we would follow completely rather than only partially. And that’s well and good—every family is different, every set of parents unique, every context distinct from every other. While the Bible gives us the broad outline of parenting, it leaves us to fill in the details in ways we believe are most faithful.

John and Cindy Raquet parent as weirdly as any of us, but their weirdnesses generally overlap with my own, and it’s for that reason that I so enjoyed reading their book Purposeful and Persistent Parenting. Thirty-one brief chapters form a good-sized book that offers a helpful combination of theory and practice.
The Raquets begin in just the right place—with a look at grace-filled parenting, by which they mean a kind of parenting in which the parents acknowledge that they themselves are the recipients of God’s grace and are then eager to display a similar grace to their children. “As grace-filled parents our relationship with our children is not based on their performance. We love them whether they obey us or not. We act in their best interest whether they obey us or not. They are just as much our sons or daughters whether they obey us or not. Our relationship with them and attitude toward them is not contingent on how they respond to us.”
Another pair of crucial opening chapters counter contemporary attitudes by reminding readers that God counts children as a blessing more than a burden and that God’s calling on parents is not first to impress or befriend their children, but to simply parent them. “If God has given you children, then you can be confident that it is God’s will for you to parent them. It is imperative for us as parents to understand that our primary role is to be our child’s parent. When we feel like we need to be more than that, we lose confidence and can start second-guessing ourselves, to the point that we start looking to the child to be making decisions that we should be making.”
The chapters that follow deal with consistency in parenting, with helping children understand they are not the center of the family (or of the universe, for that matter), with spiritual training, with developing an orientation that counts others ahead of self, and with physical discipline. In other brief chapters they deal with mealtimes, sitting still, whining, reading together, doing chores, setting family schedules, and so on. They conclude with a strong call for parents to align themselves toward faithfulness more than results. “To be sure, God has set things up such that there is a strong connection between what we as parents do and how our children respond, but it is a wrong or even arrogant attitude to think that we completely determine how our children think and behave by our parenting.”
It bears mentioning that, by their own admission, the Raquets live with an unusually high level of intentionality and this shows in some of their practical guidance—such as a family schedule that breaks an entire week into 15-minute increments and something called “toy-time tapes” which must be the most Type-A practice I’ve ever encountered in any parenting book. That said, one of the book’s strengths is that the Raquets are clear that though we all must follow the Bible’s clear commands, the rest of what they offer is just their own advice that readers are free to follow or to shrug off. “We … don’t want you to feel overly burdened by anything we wrote if you are blessed with a more relaxed personality. There are times we would have been blessed to have a few more relaxed, easygoing personalities in our home! We are thankful that God has made His local family, the church, with many different body parts, all with unique functions and gifts, according to His good plans for a balanced, functioning body!” Thus, if you don’t appreciate something like their “blue-tape boundaries,” you can mine the principles behind the practice, then find your own way to implement them.
If there is a weakness to the book, it may be the relatively cursory focus on the local church. Though the Raquets do write about children and the church, it is largely in the context of teaching them to sit still or to behave themselves. Even in the chapter about determining whether children are saved or unsaved—a chapter that is otherwise excellent—they neglect to mention the importance of involving pastors in making that determination. Yet children need pastors as much as their parents do and some focus on teaching children how to relate to pastors and when to turn to them for prayer, counsel, and help, would have gone a long way.
And then there is the matter of inculturation. Every book is written within a particular cultural context and is wrapped in certain presuppositions. In this case, the book seems to presuppose that families will be intact with both parents present, and that families will have access to a certain level of means and the privileges that tend to come with it. So, for example, the Raquets strongly express their view that it is very important for parents to protect their children from non-Christian worldviews in their early years, yet there are many people for whom this is very nearly impossible. Think, for example, of a single mom who needs to work to support her family, leaving public schools as her only educational choice, or of families who live in settings where homeschooling is forbidden and Christian schooling unavailable. Similarly, in the chapters dealing with physical discipline, there is no provision for settings where, though spanking may be permitted, the use of an instrument is not (which means parents need to make a careful, thoughtful decision about how they will carry out physical discipline), or settings where spanking is altogether outlawed (which means parents need to make a careful, thoughtful decision about if they will carry out physical discipline). These may be areas where the authors could have made even more of a distinction between principle and practice. All that said, these are relatively minor matters and certainly do not substantially detract from the book’s great strengths.
I have often thought that one of the keys to improving your parenting is to find someone who shares some of your parenting philosophies, preferences, and even eccentricities and to deliberately learn from them. And that’s exactly what Purposeful and Persistent Parenting offers. And though my days of parenting little ones are now long past, I still enjoyed this book very much and learned from it. It is rare among parenting books in this way: I would gladly hand to young parents and tell them, “If you generally follow this book and generally hold to these principles, practices, and preferences, you will do just fine.” But I might also tell them to just skip that bit about toy-time tapes…

Buy from Amazon

Westminster Books has announced a new podcast that should prove interesting. Guests include Kevin DeYoung, Rosaria Butterfield, and Al Mohler. (Also, what an accomplishment to mark 20 years and 6 million books!)

Today’s Kindle deals include several interesting titles.
(Yesterday on the blog: When You Do Not Dare To Go Alone)
The Problem Is Your Worship
“Have you ever wondered why your life isn’t going according to your plans? Your spouse isn’t playing his or her part in the marriage. Your kids aren’t following their well-behaved script. Your career isn’t flourishing the way you expected it to be. Your bank account isn’t where you want it to be. Your body doesn’t look the way you want it to look. Your house isn’t exactly where or the size you want it to be.”
Prophetic, or Merely Performative?
In this article, Kevin DeYoung discusses how Christians are to honor each other and Christ when critiquing and correcting each other.
The Day I Told God No
Seth tells of a time he knew what God was asking of him, but said no. “My first feeling was surprise, followed by a sense of freedom. I was free to say ‘no’ to the God who made me, and he let me do it. I was free to make my own way, choose my own path, make my own rules. And what would I do with that freedom? One thing was for sure: I would not do the hard, costly thing God wanted me to do. What else?”
Should My Church Staff Be Hesitant About Using ChatGPT?
Joe Carter takes an optimistic approach toward ChatGPT and suggests some ways it may prove helpful to churches.
What I Learned in My First Seven Years of Ministry
Joe shares some of the lessons he has learned through his first seven years of ministry. They are well worth reading!
When Christians Consult the World-Wide-Web as Psychic
“I’ve never graced the beaded, purple fabric doorway of a woman donning a headdress and crystal ball, but I have attempted to see a medium, and my guess is you have too. My psychic has taken the form of late-night internet searches, book purchasing, talking to trusted mentors ad nauseam, and my all-time favorite: worrying and predicting in my own mind. It’s a strategy I put hope in, devoid of drawing from the deep well God gives me in himself.”
Flashback: The Things You Think You Can Handle On Your Own
What kinds of things do I not pray about? The things I neglect to pray about are the things I believe I can handle on my own, the things for which I don’t think I need God’s wisdom, perspective, or intervention. I may never say or even think such terrible thoughts, but my lack of prayer proves my independence, my lack of God-dependence.

The experience of beauty does something profound and powerful within the heart and soul of every human being. Beauty creates wonder in us. —Steve DeWitt