Written by T. M. Suffield |
Friday, October 21, 2022
Our churches should act more like tended gardens. We as people need curation. We need a gardener, or we risk turning into human weeds: becoming without arriving. But we need that like plants do, slowly, in the right season, enjoying the timeless delights of growing in the same direction.

I’ve worked in a global corporate company and in some large public sector institutions. Every one of them has gone through some sort of major change programme while I was there. It’s the nature of the beast, nothing is perfect so every five years or so it gets reinvented—usually fixing a real problem by creating a different one.
I’ve never been a change manager but in some of these changes they’ve been things I needed to happen or things I was tasked with implementing. On other occasions they’ve been done to me, which is about as delightful as it sounds.
At my previous University we were early on in a project to implement some changes to teaching that would (all being well) improve things for students. I remember my manager expressing consternation and confusion that those we were needing to change weren’t excited about the potential changes. I know, it was a naïve thought. I looked at her and said, “because all change is loss.”
I think that surprised her, but it’s a truism. The kind of churches I’ve been part of are dynamic and change fairly frequently. This is a great strength and a great weakness. It is always pastorally difficult to help a congregation through a change—even a relatively minor one—because for someone change is always loss.
Incrementalism
Usually for those deciding on the change the loss is a desirable one, which can make it easy to lose sight of the fact that it won’t be for everyone, even if you think it should be. If you’re trying to lead change then people will be resistant to it if there is no tangible good. We have to remember that change usually challenges our underlying stories.
When change is done to you rather than with you that loss is inevitably pain rather than gain. It’s impossible to see the relative goods of the change or understand why its being done if you are a subject instead of a participant. Anyone who has been through a company reorganisation can testify to this.
Which is to say that if you’re a church leader and you’re changing something in your church’s life (and you probably are, let’s be honest), you need to consider carefully who will be impacted by the change. I would really encourage assuming someone will be rather than thinking they’ll be fine. What’s the story that this change will affect for them? Where will it hurt them, even though that wasn’t your intention?
This means organic or incremental change is easier for people to handle because we’re used to lightly editing our stories as we go along.
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In beginning a conversation, I have found a few things helpful to open up and keep myself on tract. Imagine walking up to a stranger in Memphis seeking to begin with openness and honesty, saying something like: “Hi, my name is Jonas, I am a Presbyterian pastor from Georgia and I’m here in Memphis for a denominational gathering. I’m taking time to ask people about the state of their soul. Do you have a minute to speak with me?”

Soon the 50th General Assembly will convene and God be praised that there are many who can tell of the wonderful things God has wrought in their souls through the Presbyterian Church in America (PCA). Over the last 50 years the PCA has had an abundance of things for which to give praise to God. As we gather in Memphis there is a group of PCA Teaching Elders and Ruling Elders who will be spending an hour on the streets in personal evangelism as well as in public proclamation sharing the good news of Jesus Christ, who is the only hope for men and women, boys and girls. I am writing this to be an aid by way of beginning a conversation about Jesus and His gospel with a complete stranger. There are principles which go a long way in sharing the Christian faith with someone you do not know.
These principles that need to be present in beginning a conversation with an individual are openness, honesty and sincere charity (love). In ministering to strangers you will find these three principles opening doors that otherwise would remain shut. One could easily with such things as these be reminded of George Whitefield, who even his adversaries would say, demonstrated Christian charity as they had never seen before. The man was desirable to listen to by many because of his concern, affection and honesty for all men.
In beginning a conversation, I have found a few things helpful to open up and keep myself on tract. Imagine walking up to a stranger in Memphis seeking to begin with openness and honesty, saying something like: “Hi, my name is Jonas, I am a Presbyterian pastor from Georgia and I’m here in Memphis for a denominational gathering. I’m taking time to ask people about the state of their soul. Do you have a minute to speak with me?” In being open and honest I have overwhelmingly found that whomever I am speaking to responds in kind. In every conversation you have an opportunity to be a minister of grace and apply the balm of the gospel to broken hearts. You have the opportunity to dispel falsehoods and honor Jesus in opening up conversations with care and concern.
There are two responses which typically come from this opening question, “No, sorry I don’t have time” in which case I often have tracts to give to that person and wish them a good day and ask them to read it. Or they will respond, “Sure. I have some time.” In the case that they are willing to speak with me, there are many questions to ask them, but the primary target is to get to their spiritual state. I often will follow this with questions such as: (1) Have you ever heard the word “gospel” before? Do you think you could tell me what it is? or (2) “If you were to stand before God today and be judged, do you know where you would go?” With these two questions you either get to speak of the graciousness of God in Christ in the gospel (typically from 1 Corinthians 15:1-8 — for Question 1), or you get to speak of what they ultimately hope in (Christ or works — for Question 2) and their need for Jesus who atoned for sinners.
There are many other questions to ask. Ray Comfort gives some examples in asking such law-oriented and heart-searching questions which expose heart-searching hope of Christ. But whatever questions you may ask, I hope you ask them. Christ is a treasure and we are His servants (2 Corinthians 5:4-5); let us endeavor all the more to make him known.
If you would like to come and share the gospel with me and others during the General Assembly we would love to have you join us. If unable, would you pray for us.
Commissioners and guests at the PCA General are invited to an outreach and evangelistic event on Tuesday, June 13, from 5-6 pm, along Memphis’ Beale Street. We will meet in the conference center at 4:15 pm for a brief time of intercessory prayer and then leave promptly at 4:45. If you come on your own, we will stage at the corner of Beale and BB King Blvd.  Call or text me 205-451-5433 for more information
Jonas Brock is a Teaching Elder in the Savannah River Presbytery serving at Golden Isles Presbyterian Church (PCA) on Saint Simons Island, Ga.
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Ultimately, this oracle of King Lemuel’s mother could be summed up as three warnings against the improper use of authority.  I have previously covered the topic of authority in some detail, describing how God gives us authority for the purpose of obeying Him and caring for the people He has entrusted to us.  Therefore, if we disobey Him we are acting outside of our authority.  This oracle tells us we must use our God-given authority to ensure justice and righteousness rather than abusing it on personal pleasures.  We must approach our responsibilities with sobriety, not allowing any substances or distractions to compromise our ability to make wise decisions that benefit those God has placed in our care.  Finally, we must overcome any temptation to ethical compromise that gratifies our own desire.

The words of King Lemuel. An oracle that his mother taught him: What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb? What are you doing, son of my vows? Do not give your strength to women, your ways to those who destroy kings. It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to take strong drink, lest they drink and forget what has been decreed and pervert the rights of all the afflicted. 6 Give strong drink to the one who is perishing, and wine to those in bitter distress; let them drink and forget their poverty and remember their misery no more. Open your mouth for the mute, for the rights of all who are destitute. Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy.
-Proverbs 31:1-9, ESV

When looking for leadership lessons in Scripture, I doubt Proverbs 31 would come to mind for most people.  Most Christians associate Proverbs 31 with one thing: its description of the excellent wife.  I did refer to that description in my leadership paper when discussing what the Bible teaches about women in leadership in the workplace, but aside from that its application to leaders in general is not immediately clear. In truth, the description of the excellent wife is the second of two sections of Proverbs 31.  The often-overlooked first nine verses of Proverbs 31 are an oracle about how to approach the responsibilities of kingship, but it can be applied to any type of leadership.  In addition to political leaders (Romans 13), God has appointed husbands to lead their homes and fathers assisted by mothers to lead their children (Ephesians 5:22-6:4), pastors to lead local churches assisted by deacons (1 Timothy 3, 1 Peter 5), and supervisors to lead in the workplace (Ephesians 6:5-9).  But since leadership is really about influence, everyone can lead in informal ways, which means that Scripture’s exhortations for leaders are applicable to all of us.  Therefore, leaders in all walks of life would be wise to heed the warnings of this three-thousand-year-old oracle. 
Before we can apply this oracle to leaders in general, we need to understand its context.  Proverbs 31:1 describes this as the oracle of a certain King Lemuel that was taught to him by his mother.  There is debate over who this Lemuel was.  Some think it was another name for Solomon while others believe he was a foreign king.  Regardless, it is clearly something that this king was taught this oracle by his wise mother to help him remember the most important aspects of being a king.  As such, she likely taught it to him from a young age, and the fact that it is recorded in Scripture as his words rather than hers shows that he remembered it well, so her lesson was effective.  Earlier in Proverbs, Solomon exhorts his son to not forsake his mother’s teaching (Proverbs 1:8, 6:20), and this son clearly did that by learning this oracle well enough to remember it and seeing it as important enough to pass on to others.  And since the Holy Spirit inspired this like all others passages of Scripture, we know that it was recorded for our instruction (Romans 15:4), so this oracle is just as much for us as it was for this mysterious king.
A Call to Caution
The oracle begins with a single phrase repeated three times in verse 2: “what are you doing?”.  Before looking at this phrase, it is important to note that each time it appears in verse 2, it is followed by a statement of affection from this mother to her son.  Thus, it comes from a place of great love care from a mother who wants what is best for her son, which motivates her to warn him of potential pitfalls of kingship, so she repeats the phrase “what are you doing?”.  This phrase is used by Moses’ father-in-law Jethro before the latter offered his wise and necessary advice (Exodus 18:14).  It would also be used later by God to question why Elijah had fled to Horeb (1 Kings 19:9,13) and by Nehemiah when rebuking the returned exiles (Nehemiah 13:17).  When we combine this with the statement that no one can ask that question of God (Ecclesiastes 8:4), it is clear that this statement is a precursor to correcting bad or unwise behavior.  Undoubtedly every mother has said this phrase countless times when her children are deviating from wise behavior.  The exhortation is for the child to pause and consider his or her actions, so that is what this mother is telling her royal son: stop and consider your actions. 
This is important for all people but especially for leaders.  The more powerful and influential leaders are, the more likely their words and actions are to have unintended consequences.  An off-handed comment can be taken as direction that the leader never intended, resulting in wasteful effort by subordinates trying to do what they think the leader wants.  Regardless of the level of leadership, every leader makes decisions that affect other people.  Growing up, my pastor would frequently say that there are only three things that are eternal: God, His Word, and people.  Leadership roles are temporary, but every leader is entrusted by God for a time with caring for people who He made in His image.  Therefore, it is of utmost importance for leaders to stop and consider the affects their decisions might have on those people God has entrusted to their care.  Scripture is clear that leaders will have to give an account to God for how they cared for the people God entrusted to them (Ephesians 6:9).  But the more important application for leaders is to stop and think of the ethical implications of their actions, which is what the rest of the oracle is about.  Leadership is about making decisions, which puts leaders into a position where opportunities for ethical compromise will arise, which leads to the first specific exhortation of this oracle.
Do Not Give Your Strength to Women
This mother’s first exhortation is for her son to avoid giving his strength to women (verse 3).  She even goes so far as to say that this is what destroys (literally “wipes out”) kings.
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