America’s Marriage Deserts
Marriage is good and good for us, the design of a Creator who actually has our best interests at heart. The decline of marriage in modern America is a tragedy because we weren’t made to live in a marriage-arid society, and that means improving what Wilcox calls “the state of our unions.” Thankfully, if these researchers and organizations are correct, the main thing many wandering in “marriage deserts” need in order to say “I do” is someone to tell and show them, “you can.”
For years, the term “food desert” was a way experts described areas of the country where fresh, unprocessed groceries are difficult to find. The key insight captured by this term is that obesity and other diet-related health problems aren’t solely a matter of individual choice, especially for children. They are at least partly determined by access—or lack thereof—to quality food where people live.
What if a similar pattern applies to marriage? What if there are sections of the country best characterized as “marriage deserts,” where lasting unions aren’t just rare but virtually non-existent? That’s the argument sociologist Brad Wilcox and writer Chris Bullivant made recently in Deseret News.
They suggested that “marriage deserts” are found across demographics, from inner-city minority neighborhoods to poor, rural white towns. In such places, stable marriages have essentially disappeared, and along with them, households that model what such unions look like.
This is a relatively recent development. Wilcox and Bullivant explained that in the late 1960s, marriage was the norm across classes. Just 13% of American children lived with an unmarried parent. But fast-forward fifty years, and that number has climbed to a staggering third of all children—mostly comprising the lowest income brackets.
It’s almost like a cultural bomb went off. Such high rates of single or cohabiting parenthood results in blocks on end with no married role models. And this makes the very thought of marriage seem implausible, unrealistic, or just silly for millions of American youths. Just ask them.
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The Compass Christ Sails By
Remember, Christian: Your heart is not the compass that directs Christ. His love, Word, and promises are His compass—and so they must be ours. Your salvation in Him is secure because His covenant is sure.
“Follow your heart.” We hear this time and again, the world’s mantra to find assurance in emotion and intuition. Yet this is hardly a consolation for the Christian who knows that the heart is ever-fickle and oft-misleading. When the weight of sin overwhelms, or when doubts arise, or when fears assail, what comfort is there to be had? When weary saints distrust their salvation, where can they look for assurance, rest, and peace?
The prophet Jeremiah would warn, contra the world’s call to “trust and follow your heart,” that the subjectivity of our feelings are no sure guide for our lives. “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?” (Jer. 17:9). Or, to borrow the language of Samuel Rutherford, the heart is no sure compass:
Your heart is not the compass Christ saileth by. He will give you leave to sing as you please, but he will not dance to your tune. It is not referred to you and your thoughts, what Christ will do with the charters betwixt you and him. Your own misbelief hath torn them, but he hath the principle in heaven with himself. Your thoughts are no parts of the new covenant; dreams change not Christ.[1]
In a letter written in 1637 to Earlston the Younger, Samuel Rutherford penned these assuring words to remind his friend that our salvation depends on the steadfastness of Christ and not our unsteady hearts. Evidently, Earlston was a youth who felt like he was being beaten while struggling against all manner of sin and doubt. Rutherford responded to him in three ways: He encouraged Earlston to not listen to the lies of sin or Satan; he implored Earlston to turn to Christ as the Physician of his soul; and he offered several compelling ways to fight such doubts of the heart.
Beware the Lies of Sin and the Devil
Satan “cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy,” while Jesus comes, “that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly” (John 10:10). Is it any surprise that Satan would aim to steal, kill, and destroy the Christian’s assurance in Christ? And what better tactic or strategy is there for the devil to employ than that of temptation? Is there any experience more subjectively deceiving than the momentary and fleeting pleasure of sin followed by extraordinary remorse, regret, and doubt?
The Apostle Paul had cautioned his youthful protégé Timothy to, “Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart” (2 Tim. 2:22). Rutherford’s warning to Earlston was similar:
I have seen the devil, as it were, dead and buried, and yet rise again, and be a worse devil than ever he was; therefore, my brother, beware of a green young devil, that hath never been buried. The devil in his flowers (I mean the hot, fiery lusts and passions of youth) is much to be feared: better yoke with an old gray-haired, withered, dry devil. For in youth he findeth dry sticks, and dry coals, and a hot hearthstone; and how soon can he with his flint cast fire, and with his bellows blow it up, and fire the house! Sanctified thoughts, thoughts made conscience of, and called in, and kept in awe, are green fuel that burn not, and are a water for Satan’s coal.[2]
To return to youthful lusts and passions is to dig up the devil. To do so is not only to give into the demands of a wicked enemy, but to return to an old life, though we be new creations in Christ. By turning back to Satan and sin, the Christian essentially gets on the ground alongside Satan’s burning coals and blows upon them with his own breath, causing the consuming flames of temptation and sin to burn brighter and spread. Is it any surprise that sin produces doubt in the heart?
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ESPN Broadcasters Hold Moment of Silence to Protest Florida’s Parental-Rights Bill on LGBT Ed
While progressive opponents of the legislation have labeled the measure the “Don’t Say Gay” bill, Republican state senator Dennis Baxley, who spearheaded the bill, said it is intended to restore authority to parents who are better equipped to address the topics of gender identity and sexual orientation in the early stages of childhood development.
Several ESPN broadcasters on Friday participated in an on-air moment of silence to protest Florida’s Parental Rights in Education bill, which would prohibit classroom instruction relating to sexual orientation or gender identity for students in kindergarten through third grade.
ESPN’s Elle Duncan on Friday spoke out against the Florida bill and similar proposals in other states, claiming they are “targeting our LGBTQIA+ communities.”She added that many of her ESPN colleagues planned to walk out on Friday afternoon.
“We understand the gravity of this legislation and also how it is affecting so many families across this country, and because of that our allyship is going to take a front seat,” she said.
“And with that, we’re going to pause in solidarity,” she added, before observing a moment of silence.
Meanwhile, ESPN’s Carolyn Peck and Courtney Lyle took a two-minute-long moment of silence during the NCAA Women’s Tournament on Friday to protest the bill.
“There are things bigger than basketball that need to be addressed at this time,” Lyle said. “Our friends, our family, our coworkers, the players and coaches in our community are hurting right now.”
“Our LGBTQIA+ teammates at Disney asked for our solidarity and support,” she added.Staffers at Disney, ESPN’s parent company, planned to hold walkouts last week and this week to protest the measure, the Guardian reported.
Disney CEO Bob Chapek said he and other Disney executives called Florida governor Ron DeSantis earlier this month to “express our disappointment and concern that if the legislation becomes law, it could be used to unfairly target gay, lesbian, non-binary, and transgender kids and families,” according to The Hollywood Reporter.
Chapek first came out against the bill during the company’s annual shareholder meeting when he announced Disney planned to donate $5 million to LGBTQ groups.
The bill passed the state legislature earlier this month. DeSantis is expected to sign the bill into law.Read More
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The Illiteracy of Current Issues
State of Theology: Christian Societal Responsibility
23. Christians should be silent on issues of politics.
This question deals with the Christian’s responsibility regarding society, which is clearly implied in Scripture. While Scripture does not direct or imply any particular level or nature of political involvement, it is clear that Christians should be deeply concerned about the society in which they live, seeking to improve it in ways that glorify God (Jeremiah 29:7). Israelites were commanded to care for widows, orphans, and sojourners (Deuteronomy 14:29 and 24:17) as well as to relentlessly pursue justice and mercy (Exodus 23:6, Zechariah 7:9). While these commands could be considered part of the civil law, they are undergirded by the moral law that is still just as binding today as it was then. They are part of loving your neighbor as yourself (Leviticus 19:8) and not neglecting the weighty matters of justice (Matthew 23:23) as clearly taught by Jesus. Many political issues are issues of justice, so to be silent about them is to disobey these commands. Scripture is equally clear that silence in the face of injustice and oppression are just as sinful as the injustice and oppression themselves (Job 31:16-23, Isaiah 1:16, Ezekiel 22:6-12). This means it is incompatible with Scripture to say that Christians should be silent on political issues in general. Over half of respondents across all categories affirmed that silence about politics is not commanded in Scripture, ranging from 56% of regularly attending Northeasterners to 76% of Midwest evangelicals. These results are mixed, but generally positive. While there is certainly room for debate as to how much political involvement is prudent and appropriate, it would be improper to say that silence is required. However, it is equally important to stress that while individual Christians can be involved in the political process, it is not the place of churches to be officially involved in politics. We do not wage war using the weapons of the world (2 Corinthians 10:4), including politics. The Gospel is what truly transforms society, and history teaches that such transformations are often slow. Churches must focus on the Gospel, which then compels individual believers to act in ways that advance the Kingdom of God much as it compelled people like William Wilberforce to fight against slavery over two centuries ago.
State of Theology: Extramarital Sex
25. Sex outside of traditional marriage is a sin.
This question is explicitly addressed in Scripture by the Seventh Commandment as interpreted by Jesus (Matthew 7:27-32). Scripture therefore defines “traditional marriage” as the covenantal union between one man and one woman as established by God to reflect the diversity and unity of the Trinity as well as the union between Christ and the Church (Genesis 1:28, Ephesians 5:22-33, Colossians 3:18-19, 1 Peter 1:7). Throughout Scripture, sex outside of this union is prohibited (Leviticus 15 and 20, Proverbs 5-7, Mark 10:1-12, 1 Corinthians 5-6). This is further echoed by Paul with his use of the generic term “sexual immorality” as any sexual activity outside of God’s definition of marriage (Romans 13:13, 1 Corinthians 10:8, 2 Corinthians 12:21, Galatians 5:19, Ephesians 5:3, Colossians 4:3). Thus, Scripture is clear that sex outside of traditional marriage (as defined by God) is sinful. While over half of respondents across all categories except the Northeast (at 39%) affirmed this, it is concerning that results both overall (53%) and for the Midwest (54%) were also relatively low for something so clearly taught by Scripture. Only with regularly attending evangelicals nationwide and in the Midwest were results better than 80%, showing that in certain regions and denominations the sin of extramarital sex has either been denied or neglected. This is especially concerning when we consider that this question only deals with the act of sex and not with lust, which Jesus equates with adultery (Matthew 5:27-28). Had the question included lustful thoughts, pornography, and other forms of sexual immorality outside of sex itself, I fear the results would have been much more negative. Still, it is slightly encouraging to see that in our hypersexualized society, the majority in most categories did affirm the sinfulness of extramarital sex, even if it was only a slight majority.
State of Theology: Abortion
26. Abortion is a sin.
The question of abortion is not clearly addressed in any passage of Scripture but is clearly implied by Scripture overall. Since the term “abortion” does not appear in Scripture, it must be defined first. For our purposes, abortion is the termination of a pregnancy by the willful killing of the baby in the womb. Thus abortion is a premediated act and not the death of the child during an act of medical necessity to save the mother’s life. Being the killing of a baby, abortion is sinful if it falls outside of the limitations for killing in Scripture. The command against killing in Scripture rooted in the Sixth Commandment forbidding murder, which is reiterated by Jesus, proving that it is part of the moral law and thus still applicable today (Matthew 5:21, 15:19, and 19:18, Mark 7:21 and 10:19, Luke 18:20). While speaking His covenant to Noah, God says “Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed, for God made man in his own image” (Genesis 9:6). This comes just before God reiterates the cultural mandate to be fruitful and multiply (verse 7), so it refers to all mankind (men and women of all ages). This establishes that since people are made in the image of God, killing them is a grave sin apart from specific circumstances explicitly set out by God. The first of these caveats is seen in this passage: punishment for murder or other serious crimes, which must only come after a just conviction (Numbers 35:30, see also Exodus 21:12-14. Leviticus 24:17-18, Numbers 35:31). The second is the killing of enemy combatants in battle (which is allowed in certain circumstances throughout Scripture) and when the death of a perpetrator happens due to self-defense that was not premeditated (Exodus 22:2-3). Scripturally, the killing of a person outside of these caveats is murder and thus sinful.
Scripture is equally clear that a baby in the womb is a person with equal worth to any other person.