On Jesus’ last day, we see that He spent time with God and with those He loved. The Gospel of John describes his conversation (John 13-18). Jesus spent the day in meaningful conversation with the disciples, as well as spending much time in prayer. While with His disciples, He washed their feet and ate with them. He still was teaching them throughout the day. Jesus talked about heaven, life, glorifying God, and loving others. 

I recently have been thinking through the question, What would I do if I only had one day to live? Maybe this has crossed your mind at some point, too. Many other questions swirled in my mind as I considered this question. What would I talk about? Who would I talk to? What would I do? What would be important to me? Have you ever considered this question or these questions?
Two people come to mind when I begin to contemplate this. First, my friend Jack Drury. I remember receiving the phone call from the hospital. It was during the COVID pandemic. Because of the news they had given to him, the hospital allowed my brother and I to go see him. When we arrived, he told us with a smile on his face, “I’m going to heaven.” His medical doctors had explained to him that a recent bout with COVID had left his lungs in terrible shape. And, although he looked great sitting there in the bed, he was very sick. They anticipated he would die, possibly that day. He had only his church family nearby. Throughout the rest of the day, Pastor Craig and I, alongside his wife and adopted church daughter, sat with him. We listened to him; we talked to him. In a situation like this, you wonder what the conversation would be. Well, on this day, it was all about heaven and the Bible. He couldn’t have been more excited about going to heaven. Even with death staring him in the face, I have never had a more sweeter time than those hours spent together reflecting on the Bible and heaven, plus a few more topics of interest. As I walked away from that day and since, I have wondered what I would have talked about, thought about, or done.
Another friend also comes to mind. Near the time of Jack’s death, I had another close friend die. Beth Adams enjoyed a perfect day. She served others with her morning, supported a grandchild with her afternoon, enjoyed supper with her husband, and was headed to go serve at her church when it happened. A twenty-year-old man running from the police blew through a stop sign in a stolen box truck and crashed into my friend’s small SUV. She died immediately. Shock rocked all of us as we tried to wrestle with what had happened.
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Marriage is hard. It is, at the same time, one of the great blessings and most difficult responsibilities to fulfil. But the thing that gives us strength to persevere and especially not give up hope is the knowledge that it is God who is supernaturally at work in the hearts of believers making them one. This is also why we must guard ourselves in our spirits so that we continually recommit ourselves to loving our wives (Malachi 2:15).

I was preaching at a wedding recently and was deeply challenged by my own sermon. Thankfully, by God’s grace, this happens on a regular basis! As I exhorted those who were husbands in the congregation to love their wives I realised that I didn’t do this anywhere near enough myself.
It’s not that I’d become violent or mean—although I do still need to grow in gentleness, self-control and patience—but I was convicted by God’s Spirit that I was not loving my wife as Christ does the church (Eph. 5:25). I was taking her for granted and I wasn’t really caring for her as I would my own body (Eph. 5:28).
I later realised after I made some initial steps of repentance, that this had been affecting my own fellowship with God. Prayer had become something of a “burden”, the LORD had felt distant, and I wasn’t experiencing the Spirit’s power in my life. The words of the apostle Peter were especially pertinent at this point:
Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.“ 1 Peter 3:7
All of which is say, love for one’s wife is more important than any form of spiritual success or wider influence in Christian ministry. Because if I fail at this then, as a minister of the Gospel it really undermines everything else I do. As John MacArthur states:
The true spirituality of a church leader is not measured best by how well he leads a deacons’ or elders’ meeting, by the way he participates in Sunday school, or by the way he speaks from the pulpit—but by the way he treats his wife and children at home when no one else is around. Nowhere is our relationship to God better tested than in our relationship to our family. The man who plays the part of a spiritual shepherd in church but who lacks love and care in his home is guilty of spiritual fraud.[1]
In this regard, there are a couple of verses in Scripture which have ‘haunted’ me over the years. One of them is where the apostle Paul writes in 1 Timothy 5:8, “If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” And the other is in 1 Corinthians 9:27, “…I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.” In other words, there is something about marriage that should be of first importance. Because if I fail to love my wife and children then I have not faithfully served Christ.
Is your wife a ministry “widow”?
The danger is that our wives and children can become ministry “widows” or “orphans”. We can sacrifice their spiritual well-being on the altar of our own spiritual service. And even worse, we can justify our selfish—nay, idolatrous—behaviour because of the Gospel. The words of the Lord Jesus Christ to the Pharisees are especially apt at this point where he rebuked them for their failure to honour their parents by being overzealous (yes, there is such a thing) in their ‘devotion’ to God.
“…why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition? For God said, ‘Honour your father and mother’ and anyone who curse his father or mother must be put to death.’ But you say that if a man says to his father or mother, ‘Whatever help you might otherwise have received from me is a gift devoted to God, he is not to ‘honour his father with it. Thus you nullify the word of God for the sake of your tradition. You hypocrites! Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you:
“These people honour me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. They worship me in vain; Their teachings are but rules taught by men.” Matthew 15:3-9
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The Bible calls all Christians to be above reproach, to have unquestionable character, to have a life that is so consistent that no blame or disgrace can be attached to it. Pastors (and surely any others with a public platform) are expected to exemplify this virtue. When they have been involved in a scandal that, if found out, would bring reproach upon Christ and his church, the best and wisest and holiest thing they can do is to protect Christ’s cause by removing themselves from public ministry. This is a display of true repentance, a proof of genuine remorse.

In recent months the evangelical world has been rocked by a number of scandals, by news of yet more leaders who used their churches or ministries to indulge themselves to the harm of others. These are yet more cases of men who will no doubt stand before God some day and plead all their accomplishments—“Didn’t I preach the gospel for you? Didn’t I encourage many people in their faith? Didn’t I lead many people to the Lord?” Yet despite such pleas, they will surely hear words of the severest condemnation. They will learn in that day that accomplishments stacked as high as heaven are no recompense for character sunk as low as hell.
Their stories are consistent with so many others in a number of details, including this: There were many times at which they should have stepped aside. There were many times at which, had they genuinely loved the Lord and wanted the best for his church, they would have acknowledged their disqualification from any kind of public ministry and then quietly backed away. They would have displayed their love for the Lord by their willingness to abandon the platform they had proven themselves unworthy of. There may still have been scandal, but it would have been tempered by their genuine repentance, their genuine willingness to leave behind all the benefits that came with their platform. It would have been tempered if only they had shown humility by initiating their own departure.
But that’s not the way it goes, is it? No one ever resigns. No one ever steps aside. No one ever has such integrity that he counts himself disqualified and removes himself from public ministry. Or very few, anyway.
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