In the past couple of years I have learned more about cemeteries than I would ever have cared to know. I have learned about purchasing plots and commissioning monuments. I have learned about proper etiquette and how different cultures relate to their dearly departed in very different ways. I have learned that a grave offers a place to go to grieve and, as importantly, a place to leave grief behind for a time.

One thing we learned quickly is that while a cemetery will take great care in burying a loved one, raising a monument, and sodding over the stark, bare earth, they will take very little care in watering that grass or ensuring that it grows and thrives. Once the grave is closed and the grass replaced, they will offer only the barest maintenance. That’s true, at least, of the cemetery we chose for our son.
We cannot tolerate the thought of Nick’s grave being covered in dry, brown grass. We cannot tolerate the thought of it becoming overgrown with weeds. We cannot tolerate the thought of it looking overlooked and abandoned. And so we tend to it with great care. We visit it regularly. We water it diligently. We maintain a tiny garden that sits up against the gravestone, adapting it to the seasons.
I might have been tempted to believe that grass would grow best if was only ever sunny and that flowers would thrive best under the constant glare of the sun. I might have been tempted to believe that days of gloom and cloud would slow progress and inhibit growth. But I have come to observe that this is not the case, for clouds bring rain and rain brings life. Meanwhile, unbroken sun quickly dries the ground and leaves it parched. We have come to look forward to dark skies and brooding clouds, for we know the grass will soon be greener, the flowers brighter and straighter, all of it more colorful and more beautiful.
You and I are not too different from grass and flowers, for as God sees fit to have them grow through sun and rain, he sees fit to have us grow through joy and grief. As it is his will that they display their beauty through good weather and bad, it is his will that we display our beauty through easy times and difficult. The beauty he wishes for us to display is the beauty of character that is heavenly rather than worldly, that is divine rather than so naturally human.
Such character does not come easily to us, for we enter the Christian life with long-established patterns of sinfulness and selfishness, of caring much for ourselves and little for others. For our lives to display godly beauty, we must be changed, we must be transformed. And this kind of transformation needs more than ease, more than merely good times.
For this reason God leads us into times of grief and sorrow, times of sickness and loss, times of pain and persecution. He knows that for us to truly thrive in this world and for us to truly be fit for what lies beyond it, we need both sun and rain, both joy and sorrow. In the bright sun of the best of times we may grow in love and joy and peace and patience, for these virtues tend to be the ones that spring up first and bloom fastest. But it is often only in the dark gloom of the worst of times that we grow in kindness and gentleness and self-control, for virtues like these tend to grow slowly and only under specific conditions. If we are to be the Christians God wishes us to be, we must have sun and rain, clear days and cloudy.
And so, as we approach times of sorrow and suffering, when they sweep over us with all their pain and all their tears, all their agony and all their uncertainty, we never need fear that God has forgotten us or forsaken us. We never need fear that we will emerge worse than we entered in. For God has ordained that these times are necessary for our growth, necessary for us to take on the beauty of godly character. God has ordained that we will be like flowers—flowers that spring up in the rain.

I’m grateful to Radius International for sponsoring the blog this week to let you know about their forthcoming conference (which you can attend in-person or virtually). Sponsors are crucial to the functioning of this site, so I’m thankful for each and every one.

Today’s Kindle deals include a small selection of classics.
(Yesterday on the blog: Urban Legends of Theology)
Forgiving Ourselves
This is a good take on the idea of forgiving ourselves. “I don’t think it is appropriate to speak of forgiving ourselves in any way. But, at the same time, we need to acknowledge that the Bible does have quite a bit to say about how we should and should not think of ourselves and how we should and should not treat ourselves in light of who we are in Christ Jesus.”
Does Maturity Still Matter?
“American culture writ large seems stuck in a defensive adolescence that lacks both the innocence and wonder of childhood, and the realism and long-term thinking of adulthood. Comic book movies are the new American mythology, and the characters in these comic book movies are often just hard-bodied, fast-talking teenagers: the kind of people who, in the words of the most influential man of the 21st century, ‘move fast and break things.’”
What Is a Church?
Here’s a really helpful article that answers a simple question: What is a church?
Building Accountability around Counselees
Writing for the Biblical Counseling Coalition, Tim St. John provides counsel on accountability.
Are home groups really the best vehicle for Christian growth?
Home groups can be good and helpful. But are they necessary? Do they accomplish something in the life of the church that nothing else can?
Flashback: The Tone Deaf Singer
We sing best when that gospel is dwelling richly within us. God is not looking at the quality of our tone or the perfection of our pitch. He is looking at the heart.

The enemy of joy is not suffering, it is idolatry. —Matt Papa

Logos users, we are getting near the end of March Matchups and the deals keep getting better. Also be sure to vote in the second-to-last round.

God Saved Me from a Polygamist Cult
“When people ask my wife and me how we met, the story of how Christ met us inevitably takes over. It’s unavoidable from the moment I say, ‘Well, we actually met in a polygamous Mormon cult.’ Eyes grow wide, and folks eventually find a few words like, ‘Wait . . . what?’ Their questions lead us into a testimony to boundless grace. It’s a story of doubt, God’s stubborn love, some dead friends, and a book by Tim Keller.”
How the Holy Spirit Helps Us Read Scripture
We know that the Scriptures are inspired, but as Jonathan Pennington explains here, “the Holy Spirit’s role does not stop with the writing of the texts. Good interpretation is also dependent on the ongoing work of the Spirit to in-spire us to understand, receive, and apply what God has spoken.”
Match of the Day Without Commentary – Lessons for the Church
This article considers the way pastors may say too much or too little as they lead a worship service.
Is my depression really part of God’s plan?
Stephen Kneale: “Somebody asked me yesterday whether I thought my getting depression was part of God’s plan. I thought that was a really interesting question and thought I would share my view on that here.”
How we lost our families and movies in one move
Mwansa Mbewe has a bit of a fiery one here to explain how and why Africa is losing its stories.
Why Read If You Forget Most Everything Anyway?
“If you can’t remember most of what you read, why even bother? Aren’t there better ways to use your time?” Trevin answers exactly the way I would (and often have).
Flashback: Drowning in an Ocean of Encouragement
Just as we have been taught to take 10 looks at the cross for every one look at ourselves, perhaps we ought to speak 10 words that will build up—or better yet, a hundred—for every word that might pull down.

We need the all-sufficiency of Jesus applied in rich measure to our deepest points of personal need. —Ray Ortlund