Daniel Harris

Walking in the Dark

Knowledge of the facts beforehand would lessen the need, which in turn would lessen the meeting of that need. Gone would be that wonderous experience of God’s power in the extremity of your need. Gone would be the marvel of watching provision come in ways unforeseen, the thrill of receiving the delivery of the promise. The script takes that away, and you would be left with less reason to glorify Him as you do walking for years by faith and finally experiencing deliverance.

Do you ever wish God would tell you beforehand all you are supposed to do?
I remember having this desire 10 years ago as a senior about to graduate college. The road ahead looked like a tree branching into a thousand offshoots. Where was I to go? What was I to do? Who was I to marry?
I wished then that God would send me a book from heaven: Daniel’s book. It would describe in every detail my life from that moment to my death. It would tell all I would do and achieve and become. The confusion of the immediate would be erased. The frustrations of the murky present would be gone. All I would have to do would be to follow the book: move back home, take this particular job position, fall in love with this girl…etc.
Easy as.
But God does not work this way and you don’t have to be an expert in theology to deduce this. All throughout the Bible we see God intentionally withhold key information from individuals, leaving them to walk in the dark. The greater context, the purpose, the details, the whys and the hows are all hidden from the human agents; information that would have done much to alleviate anguish and pain in the moment is purposefully obscured.
Abraham and Isaac is a key example of this intentional withholding. God could have told Abraham from the outset, “What we are going to do is a performative rehearsal; an acting out of something to come. Take your son, your only son to Mount Moriah and sacrifice him there, but don’t worry! In the nick of time I will provide a substitute. And you and your son will be fine.” But no, Abraham is entirely left in the dark and given as little information as possible. Go and sacrifice your son.
God did not need to learn anything about Abraham through this ordeal. It is not that He was unsure of the Abraham’s faith beforehand and needed to test him to discover the quality. God knows all things. Why then the unnecessary anxiety? Why hide key information from this special friend of God?
Joseph could have used some information from the start as well: “Your brothers are going to sell you into slavery, you will be falsely accused as a servant, and sent to prison. But stay with me. At the right time I will raise you up to interpret Pharaoh’s dream and thereby save multitudes from famine. You will also be the second in command.” But no, Joseph has very little to go on throughout his drawn out trial.
Or consider Job. Little did he know he was part of a heavenly contest. His mind and suffering could have been greatly eased if only he knew a little more about what God was doing and why He was doing it.
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In Every Change

Although we can’t peer into every reason why God’s providence unravels as it does, we can be assured that every disruption has a specific purpose and will work out for our good. In every change—the good, the bad, and the ugly—let us then hold fast to the promises and watch the Lord provide, for He faithful will remain.

I am sitting on the cusp of another addition to my family. Montana is 38 weeks pregnant as I write this, and she is understandable ready to be done: August heat and all. Baby number 4’s gender is unknown per usual with the Harrises, and we are preparing to navigate the changes involved and do the baby thing yet again.
It’s the deep breath before the plunge.
Something about big changes rattles me a bit. Growing up, I only moved one time, and that was when I was young. I attended the same school from Kindergarten through 12th grade. I attended my church from early childhood to the present, albeit with a college hiatus in the middle. As a child this continuity was good and provided me much security. I knew where I belonged and had an established network of support which I am very thankful for.
I have since noticed in myself, however, a general aversion and reluctance towards change in general, good changes included. It is safe to say I am not your risky early adapter. The way I see it, if you have a good thing going for you, you keep that good thing! Don’t deviate, you keep riding that good thing through to the bitter end. With this reserve, it is interesting how the Lord has seen fit to give me a slew of changes in recent years: marriage 7 years ago (to a wife who likes change, of course), 4 children in 6 years, 3 moves in 6 years, and a few job changes to boot.
You may think that sounds perfectly reasonable, but to me it is substantive.
Life is full of significant changes we must walk through: the change from childhood to adulthood, the transition from dependence to independence, the entering into positions of responsibility and leadership. There are the joyous family changes of marriage and new children, as well as the sorrowful changes tragedies and loss bring. Then come the changes of aging: illnesses, the diminution of former ability, the loss of youthful energy–all leading up to that culmination when death shall bring our change.
The whole of human existence is one of mutability and continual alteration, and yet these significant markers that stand above the rest.
Change Forces Us Look to God
In each major alteration there is an opportunity for us to break our self-reliance and look to God. These big changes have a way of shattering those least resistance patterns we fall into day after day, patterns we are familiar with because they are so easy. It’s not that these rhythms are bad, for some they can be seasons of much productivity, but they often provide an illusion of safety and control. When faced with a period of prolonged stability, we become comfortable to continue in it. And why wouldn’t we? Things are going well, after all, and we are not stressed or frantically re-evaluating how we are going to make it. We are not forced to ask God for help in the midst of our business as usual peace. We are accustomed to it and we know what to expect: “we have made it thus far and we will continue in the same way.” Since it has been working well we naturally think it will continue to work this same way.
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