Most of us are familiar with the term “means of grace.” Means of grace are the ways in which the Holy Spirit works in our lives to lead us into holiness. You might think of them as the “channels” through which sanctifying grace flows from God to his people. Most prominently he does this through Scripture, prayer, and the ordinances of baptism and Lord’s Supper (or, more broadly, through the unique ministry of the local church). But did you know that historically some people also understood Christian friendship to be a means of grace? They did not mean that friendship actually bestows grace, but that it is a means through which God accomplishes his work of sanctification. Whether or not friendship can rightly be categorized as a means of grace, these believers certainly understood the importance and benefits of close, brother-to-brother, iron-sharpening-iron relationships.

Such friendships are the theme of Michael Haykin’s new book Iron Sharpens Iron: Friendship and the Grace of God. His purpose in the book is not to provide a theology or philosophy of friendship as much as it is to provide historical examples of friendships—examples that focus on a pair of fascinating eighteenth-century characters: Andrew Fuller and John Ryland. “Iron Sharpens Iron is about the specific way that friendship functioned as a means of grace for two eighteenth-century men.” It’s an interesting way of going about his task and one that is effective since, as the old saying goes, some things are better caught than taught so that we sometimes learn better by vivid example than straight-up instruction.
The book begins with an overview of the history of friendship from the ancient world all the way to the eighteenth century, pausing to consider Greek philosophers, a selection of Old and New Testament characters, Church Fathers, and Reformers. From there Haykin provides a brief biographical overview of his two central subjects, then devotes a chapter to three particularly important friendships: John Newton and John Ryland; Andrew Fuller and Thomas Steevens, and then, of course, Andrew Fuller and John Ryland. In each case he tells how they became friends, how they sustained their friendship, and what benefits it brought to them. “It is on the grounds of these men’s experience of the joys and challenges of Christian friendship” that he makes his case for the importance of friendship to the Christian life.
Modern Western culture is not particularly friendly to friendship and for quite a number of reasons it seems to have fallen on hard times. “Such friendships take time and sacrifice, and the West in the early twenty-first century is a busy, busy world that, generally speaking, is far more interested in getting and possessing than sacrificing and giving.” Then there is the culture that places self ahead of others and the sexual revolution that perhaps makes men afraid of relational intimacy lest it somehow convey the existence of sexual intimacy. The cards are stacked against it.
Yet Christian friendship remains important and a blessing—a means of grace, even—to those who commit to it and experience its joys. Says Haykin, “this research and writing have convinced me that friendship is not merely a subject of personal interest but is vital for the advance of God’s reign in the world. I believe firmly that whenever God has done great things in the history of the church, he has done it through a group of friends, a band of brothers and sisters.” It’s my hope that Iron Sharpens Iron will foster more precious friendships that the Lord will use for the good of his people and the glory of his name.

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Darry Dash: “If you don’t think pastoral ministry will be hard, you’re wrong. Of course, it’s not the only hard vocation. Our congregations are filled with people who fill challenging roles. Pastoral ministry comes with many joys. My point, though, is this: it’s also filled with hazards and difficulties. If you suffer from idealism, pastoral ministry will beat it out of you.”

“Sometimes, to protect a passage of scripture from the abuses it receives from those who twist it, we add so many qualifications that we eliminate not only the false teaching but also the profound truth it communicates.” That’s a bad thing! Doug offers a common example here.

Kristin tells a story and describes what she learned from it. “I have thought about the dog and the man many times over the years. When I feel myself growing weary and frustrated with people who are repeatedly toying around with God and Scripture, claiming the label Christian while digging in their heels and living precisely as they please? I am learning to pause, pray, and walk away.”

“There are generally two basic forms in which this question is asked. First, most Christians have at some point asked themselves, ‘If I’m a true Christian, why do I keep sinning?’ Second, Christians and others have asked questions like, ‘How could Christians have committed such atrocities during the Crusades?’ The two questions are different, but they have essentially the same theological and biblical answer.”

Michael Kruger explains why in-person is generally best, but online is also necessary. “At RTS, here’s what we have learned. It’s the combination of both residential and online education that seems to work best. While we have intentionally placed the priority on residential, the online courses provide a wonderful supplement. In other words, the online program is not replacing our residential degree but enhancing it.”

“How is this exhortation still relevant to us today, in the West? The Bible must not be re-interpreted according to current cultural trends. However, part of accurately interpreting God’s Word is to recognize that it was written into a specific culture and context. And so it is important to recognize that a command to specifically ‘kiss’ one another may not translate seamlessly to American culture today.”

When we say, “In Jesus’ name,” we pray in the name of the one who has been exalted to the highest place, the one who has had bestowed upon him the name that is above every name…

God’s commands are not designed to rob you of life or to plunder your freedom, but to graciously protect you from harm.
—Paul Tripp

Why is it that billionaires always seem to want to live forever? Why is it that the 1% of the 1% almost always seem to veer from their core businesses into attempts to prolong their lives indefinitely? Amazon’s Jeff Bezos is invested in Altos Labs which is attempting a kind of “biological reprogramming” to extend lifespans. Google’s Sergey Brin and Larry Page were instrumental in launching a business called “Calico” which is carrying out studies that may eradicate all disease. PayPal’s Peter Thiel is a big supporter of the Methuselah Mouse Prize foundation which means to dramatically improve health and longevity. Ethereum’s Vitalik Buterin has decided it’s likely that people born today will live to the age of 3,000 and is already participating in experimental treatments he believes may slow his body’s aging.1

Why is it that so many billionaires seem so intent on extending their lives beyond the promised threescore and ten? Could it be that all their wealth has made their lives so amazing that they simply can’t bear the thought of dying? Could it be that their massive yachts, their luxury mansions, their ability to buy anything their hearts desire, has given them such satisfaction that they want to enjoy it forever? Could it be that they have unlocked the key to a satisfaction so deep that it’s only right to extend it indefinitely?
I suppose it’s possible, but I tend to think there’s another factor at play. I, after all, have read Solomon, the ancient-day equivalent of these modern-day billionaires—a man who had everything the human heart could ever desire. I have read his Song and his Proverbs and his Ecclesiastes. And from his inspired words I have gained some important perspective.
Why is it that billionaires always seem to want to live forever? I am convinced it isn’t because their lives are so satisfying but because their lives are so very dissatisfying. I am convinced it isn’t because their hearts are so full but because their hearts are so very empty. In 40 or 50 years they have risen to the highest ranks of humanity when measured by wealth, but have found there are some things money cannot buy.
They have attempted to leverage their money and power to increase their happiness. Women have been used and found wanting. The finest real estate has been added to their personal portfolio, but an extra 10 bedrooms and 20 bathrooms has not satisfied the restlessness of their hearts. They’ve owned fast cars and grand yachts, hobnobbed with royalty and celebrity, been cheered for their philanthropy and lauded for their generosity. And yet as they lay awake in the dark watches of the night, their hearts are still not at rest. As they stare at the vaulted ceilings high above their beds they still wonder “isn’t there more than this?”
They, like us, consider near escapes from deadly accidents or skirmishes with serious illnesses and know it could have all come crashing down. They, like us, hear the ticking of the clock that signals the end. And how do they respond? They respond by doubling down. They want more time to search for anything that will satisfy the longing of their hearts—more money, more women, more cars, more mansions, more plaudits, more power. More, more, more. And to explore that, they need more time, more years, more longevity.
The difference between them and Solomon is simply one of honesty. Solomon had experienced the very heights of what the world can offer and, rather than doubling down, had the integrity to say “Vanity of vanities! All is vanity.” He had the insight to say “All things are full of weariness; a man cannot utter it; the eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing.” He had the understanding, after accumulating all the treasures of the ancient world, to say “Behold, all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun.”
Solomon was a man who had deep passions, a restless heart, and many serious flaws. Yet he had the wisdom to know that God has put eternity into our hearts so that nothing less than what is eternal can ultimately satisfy. He had the wisdom to turn his heart from the temporal to the eternal, from what he could hold in his hands to what he could take only by faith. He had the wisdom to embrace rather than deny or flee his own mortality, the wisdom to know that the whole duty of man is to fear God and keep his commandments, the wisdom to live with the knowledge that God would judge his every deed, whether good or evil.
I have often been struck that while here on earth we count gold as the most precious of possessions, in heaven it’s used to merely pave the streets. What we count supremely valuable here is trod underfoot there. That description at once highlights the splendor of heaven and the futility of wealth. It at once shows that all the wealth of all the worlds would do nothing to make heaven any better for the wealthy than for the impoverished, for the richest billionaire than the poorest pauper.
So many of the world’s wealthiest people live their lives to accumulate what heaven counts as meaningless. They put their hope in finding joy in what they can take and earn, what they can have and hold. Yet, even if they manage to extend their lives a few years or a few decades they, too, will go the way of all the earth. They, too, will live forever, though only beyond the grave. They, too, will find that the greatest pleasures of this world pale in comparison to the greatest pleasures, or greatest torments, of the world to come.